Accepted to Harvard? Shhh, don’t tell anyone!
In an attempt to ease the blow of a student’s first big rejection, New York prep schools are instituting dress codes and Facebook guidelines barring excited seniors from broadcasting their acceptance to top-tier colleges because it would hurt their classmates’ feelings.
At the hyper-competitive Horace Mann School, students are not permitted to wear college apparel, including status Ivy League sweatshirts, on campus until after May 1, when most students have settled on what school they’ll attend.
And at the Packer Collegiate Institute, students are instructed not to update Facebook with university news until after school lets out.
“In recent years, schools have been looking to minimize the disappointment that always exists with college admissions,” said Dean Skarlis, president of the College Advisor of New York.
“But kids need to experience disappointment. We coddle them a little too much. At some point, they won’t get a job, or they’ll get fired. If I were head of a school, I would shy away from that sort of policy.”
At the private Calhoun School, seniors have a weekly class with the college guidance counselor, in which they discuss “the appropriate way to share news of acceptance,” said Sarah Tarrant, director of college counseling. “The weekly conversation reins in kids who might run around yelling, ‘I got in! I got in!’ ”
The city’s selective public high schools are also implementing rules to save the egos of students forced to attend “safety schools.”
“It can be bad and it can get weird,” said Darby McHugh, college coordinator at Bronx HS of Science. “We send a notice out to all faculty telling them, ‘Please don’t congratulate students in public, no high fives, no hugging, and please be sensitive so that if you see someone crying, you refer them to the college-adviser office immediately.’ ”