ALBANY — Gov. Bumble rolled into the circus to squirt cold water on the bad senators who were ru ining his day and keeping him up here in the state capital well past happy hour.
David Paterson, the zhlub who accidentally fell into the governor’s chair after Eliot Spitzer succumbed to a paid bimbo, looked like a bimbo himself.
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He huffed. He puffed. He threatened. He tried to raise his voice. But, as in a dream, it came out as barely more than a squeak.
“As for the senators, I will continue to deny their per diems and travel vouchers!” squeaked Gov. Bumble. “I will call on the comptroller to not pay them a dime!”
So unpleasant. So non-threatening. And Gov. Bumble is a man who prefers to be loved.
Yesterday, the formerly great state of New York was collapsing into an embarrassing puddle of goo. So claimed the Gov, whom no one listens to. So claimed Mayor Bloomberg, who beamed electronically into the Gov’s press conference from the city like a big, giant head.
As the “do-nothing” Senate fiddled, sales taxes back in the city needed to be raised!
Worse, Bloomberg threatened to bring back the old, crummy Board of Education, which looks like a well-oiled machine next to this crew.
Meanwhile, that happy hour was slipping away. Just after midday, though, Gov. Bumble called us into a room to announce good news. Enough senators — finally! — had joined together, after nearly a month of this Clown College on the Hudson, to pass some bills. Hooray!
But within five minutes, the Clown-in-Chief changed his mind.
Right there, I witnessed the most surreal event I’ve ever seen in a press conference.
Gov. Bumble received a telephone call from state Sen. Frank Padavan. “He’s on the phone now?” the gov asked. “I’ll take the call!”
Two minutes later, Paterson came back, looking as if he’d been kicked. As it turned out, Padavan (R-Queens) was making his way to the members’ lounge, not voting with the Senate. Another whole day, wasted.
“I will not sign any legislation passed,” said Gov. Bumble, looking as if he desperately needed that margarita.
As the capital sunk further into chaos, Gov. Bumble sunk further into incompetence.
He’s lost control, absolutely and completely. Give this man a drink.