Home is where you hang your hat — and in Rip Torn’s case, that was a neighborhood bank.
The “Men in Black” star was so drunk when he stumbled out of his local watering hole and down the block to the Litchfield Bancorp in Lakeville on Friday night, that he thought he was at his house, cops said yesterday.
He even took off his hat and boots and left them at the door, a police report noted.
And who could blame him? The bank is, after all, housed in a two-story colonial with an attic.
Then again, one clue that Torn was in the wrong place might have been that the door wouldn’t open.
But Torn measured more than twice the legal blood-alcohol limit, cops revealed, and having to bust a rear window to get into his “house” might not have been that unusual for the “30 Rock” actor, who is infamous for his losing battles with booze.
Torn staggered around the bank — with a pistol in his pocket — and didn’t understand why troopers showed up to arrest him, according to police.
“Torn asked why we took him out of his house,” according to a report filed by state Trooper James Parker. “Torn repeatedly asked why we put him in handcuffs and when we informed him he was in a bank carrying a gun, he asked the same question.”
The report was made public yesterday as Torn appeared in a Litchfield courtroom, where he was formally charged with trespassing, burglary and firearms counts after spending the weekend in jail.
A disheveled Torn, 78, wearing the same boots he’d left amid the broken glass at the bank’s back door, entered no plea and posted $100,000 bail.
The handcuffed actor limped into court and still seemed disoriented despite his nearly three days of drying out in a cell.
Police records showed that Torn blew a .203 on a Breathalyzer test, taken 2½ hours after he allegedly broke into the bank.
He was charged with possessing a gun while intoxicated, because the .203 blood-alcohol level is more than twice the legal drunken-driving limit.
Defense lawyer Thomas Waterfall said his client will enter an alcohol rehab clinic in upstate New York as soon as today.
“He does not recall the evening,” Waterfall said of Torn’s loony night. “Obviously, he was not there to commit a crime.”
Torn’s driver’s license had been suspended due to earlier DUI arrests, so he hoofed a quarter mile from his home to the Boathouse tavern on Main Street on Friday night, witnesses said.
The bar’s owner told The Post that Torn ate oysters, but declined to say if the actor was drinking.
But several witnesses said the actor had been throwing back cocktails before stumbling out of the watering hole and taking a wrong turn toward the bank.
Although Litchfield Bancorp, just 200 feet from the Boathouse, looks nothing like Torn’s house, the two-story yellow Colonial does not resemble a commercial building and could be mistaken for a home — especially to someone who was smashed.
“Obviously this is a serious event, so we will deal with it as we go on,” Waterfall said.
Torn appeared “highly disoriented,” smelled of booze, had his fly unzipped and was still wearing at least two layers of coats, according to state troopers.
The “Larry Sanders Show” actor — with blood-shot eyes — allegedly mumbled his response to police, before a trooper grabbed his arm, forced him to the ground and threw on handcuffs.
A pat-down showed that Torn was carrying a .22-caliber revolver, loaded with nine rounds, in his right pocket, cops said.