FOR punk rock fans – and those who just miss those out-of-control years of punk, graffiti, glam rock and heroin – comes “What We Do Is Secret,” an unsatisfying biopic of the Germs, the seminal LA punkers led by Darby Crash.
While Crash OD’d like Sid Vicious of the Sex Pistols, this is hardly on par with the more riveting 1986 film “Sid & Nancy.” In fact, it’s more like “Sid & Sid.” Crash seems to have been a closeted homosexual who strangely enough hid this aspect of himself while fearlessly showing his insanity and guts onstage.
Too bad the acting is as uneven as the story. Shane West (Crash), Bijou Phillips (Lorna Doom), Rick Gonzalez (Pat Smear) and Noah Segan (Don Bolles) certainly reach some good heights, but the acting also dips to some dopey lows when the actors just seem to be, well, acting.
Another thing: Somebody should have fired the wig maker, because some of these rugs – especially Don the drummer’s – look like they were stolen off a mannequin at Cheap Jack’s.
If you loved the Germs and their one and only album, you’ll love the movie – unless, of course, you think that re-creating the world’s second most destructive band is a sacrilege and is counter to everything for which punk stood.
Running time: 92 minutes. Rated R (language, sex, drugs, self-mutilation). At the Landmark Sunshine Cinema.