‘A Novel Romance” supplies a response to the question, “Is Steve Guttenberg still working?” but leaves unanswered the natural follow-up: “Why?”
The surgically altered remains of Guttenberg, whose lack of facial movement has now caught up to his lack of talent, are of interest strictly to those who consider Albert Brooks too macho. He plays a failed and jobless former ad man trying to sell his first novel while inexplicably becoming roommates with a bombshell friend (Milena Govich) of his ex-girlfriend. She is young enough, though not nearly unattractive enough, to be his daughter. Her last boyfriend was a sharp-dressed financier, so naturally all she needs is a montage of wacky-roomie moments to fall for this desiccated loser. When she, panting with lust, begs him to make love to her, I think I speak for all of us when I say, “Ick.” Ick to the utmost. Squared.
Wince-worthy as Guttenberg is, he cannot be accused of being worse than the amateurish direction and the trite script (both by Allie Dvorin) stuffed with insufferable romcom banter and putrid dirty jokes. Some films go straight to video; this one should have bypassed that step and headed for the incinerator.