OK. At the top, let’s do away with the silliness: Yes, 50 years ago next Wednesday, the Mets officially were born, got hammered 11-4 by Stan Musial and the Cardinals in St. Louis, and were off on a six-month race with futility, losing three times more than they won, losing more games — 120 — than any franchise in any sport ever has lost in a single season.
No, the 2012 Mets are not going to match that record.
If we can agree that the 1962 Mets were the gold standard (or the zinc standard, perhaps) for ineptitude, there are several candidates for which one comes next. The 103-loss Worst Team Money Could Buy team of 1993 makes a strong case, thanks to their bleach spraying and firecracker slinging. The 2003-04 versions, brightened by Art Howe’s personality lighting up the room, demand a spot in the team photo. As do just about any team from 1963-67, though ’63’s 111-loss team which finished 48 games out of first place (and 15th out of ninth) merits special consideration.
Still, as a representative of the franchise’s darkest, gloomiest period, it’s impossible to overlook 1979, when the team lost 99 games (and had to go on a heroic six-game winning streak to close the season), finished 35 games behind the first-place Pirates (and 17 behind the fifth-place Cubs) and drew 788,905 customers to Shea Stadium, including a nine-game homestand to close the home schedule that attracted a total of 48,960 die-hards — 27,033 of whom came for Fan Appreciation Day. Fans got a tote bag; they should have been allowed to play shortstop (and couldn’t have done worse; the Mets went 0-9 on the homestand).
No, the 2012 Mets are not going to be that bad, either.
Pessimism rules the day around this franchise, and the franchise has earned it, no question. Ownership has been through a humiliating public ringer of its own creation. Just because it didn’t end cataclysmically for the Wilpons doesn’t mean they haven’t acted irresponsibly with this team and its finances. There have been three straight losing seasons where whatever joy that flickered always was countered by terrible doses of injury and larger helpings of off-field malpractice. And that followed three seasons — 2006, ’07, ’08 — that were among the most successful in franchise history, though all three ended apocalyptically.
And, as much as we say these things don’t matter, and as often as it’s proven that they don’t matter, the Mets did just complete a spring training in which they won nine and lost 20 (for the record: They were 12-15 in ’62, 10-13 in ’79).
So, yes, it is easy to be swept away by the bad. It is understandable why optimistic Mets fans almost always feel the need to preface their hope, even in April, with qualifiers: “Look, I don’t expect to win the World Series, but …” “I’m not saying this is the ’86 Mets, but …” And so on. And so on.
But it’s one thing to accept in both your heart and your head that you may not want to save up for playoff tickets. It’s another thing to start talking foolish. The very fact the 2012 Mets will start their “A” lineup today already puts them far ahead of 2011, when manager Terry Collins never once got to do that.
Is Johan Santana what he was? Probably not, no. Will you feel better every fifth (or sixth) day when he’s on the mound anyway? Probably, yes.
This was the lineup the ’62 Mets threw at the Cardinals on Opening Day: Richie Ashburn, CF; Felix Mantilla, SS; Charlie Neal, 2B; Frank Thomas, LF; Gus Bell, RF; Gil Hodges, 1B; Don Zimmer, 3B; Hobie Landruth, C; Roger Craig, P. There are many reasons a team can lose 120 games, one is when your No. 3 hitter is Charlie Neal.
This was the lineup Joe Torre sent out onto Wrigley Field on April 5, 1979: Lee Mazzilli, CF; Kelvin Chapman, 2B; Richie Hebner, 3B; John Stearns, C; Willie Montanez, 1B; Steve Henderson, LF; Elliott Maddox, RF; Doug Flynn, SS; Craig Swan, P. Yes, that is John “Bad Dude” Stearns — 46 lifetime homers — as your cleanup hitter.
Those are hopeless teams. Maybe we aren’t exactly setting a bar that would require Sergey Bubka’s old pole to vault over, OK? But it could be a lot worse.
It has been a lot worse.
michael.vaccaro@nypost.com