Fergie‘s addiction to crystal meth wasn’t without its share of consequences, even a year after her chronic drug use.
“I was [suffering from] chemically-induced psychosis and dementia. I was hallucinating on a daily basis,” the singer said in a candid interview with iNews. “It took a year after getting off that drug for the chemicals in my brain to settle so that I stopped seeing things. I’d just be sitting there, seeing a random bee or bunny.”
At her lowest point, Fergie, 42, believed the FBI and SWAT teams were tracing her every move, leading her to seek solace in a church.
“I remember thinking: ‘If I walk outside, and the SWAT team’s out there, I was right all along. But if they’re not out there, then it’s the drugs making me see things and I’m going to end up in an institution,” she recalled. “And if it really is the drugs, I don’t want to live my life like this anymore, anyway.’ I walked out of the church; obviously, there was no SWAT team, it was just me in a parking lot. It was a freeing moment.”
The mother of 4-year-old son Axl is grateful she eventually snapped out of her drug-induced phase.
“The drugs thing, it was a hell of a lot of fun … until it wasn’t,” she said. “But you know what, I thank the day it happened to me. Because that’s my strength, my faith, my hope for something better.”
This isn’t the first time the former Black Eyed Peas has openly spoken about her struggle with addiction. In September 2006, she told Time crystal meth was the “hardest boyfriend” she ever had to break up with.
“It’s the drug that’s addicting. But it’s why you start doing it in the first place that’s interesting. A lot of it was being a child actor; I learned to suppress feelings,” Fergie said, via CBS News.