In a survey of the “Craziest Politicians of 2014,” GQ had difficulty locating any Democrats. Seventeen out of 20 on the list were Republicans, with the only liberals being Texas Rep. Sheila Jackson Lee, Georgia Rep. Hank Johnson and America’s reigning nabob of nuttiness, Joe Biden.
In a note appended to the story, GQ defensively said it wasn’t guilty of “standard liberal-media bias,” it just couldn’t find any loony Democrats to speak of.
Let’s give GQ a little help, shall we? Here are 16 more Democrats for the list of the most cra-cra political figures.
Rep. Debbie Wasserman Schultz, Democratic National Committee chair (Fla.):
Compared Wisconsin Gov. Scott Walker to a wife-beater: “Scott Walker has given women the back of his hand. I know that is stark. That is direct. But that is reality. What Republican tea party extremists like Scott Walker are doing is they are grabbing us by the hair and pulling us back. It is not going to happen on our watch.” Wait, I’m confused, this abuse already happened, is happening, but “it’s not going to happen”?
Rep. Barbara Lee (Calif.):
Called for a $26 minimum wage so that “people . . . could afford to live in areas now where they cannot afford to live” and “you would increase diversity in certain communities where you don’t have diversity anymore. You would have economic parity.” Nah, $26 an hour isn’t going to diversify Park Avenue. Try $260 an hour, that’ll work!
Sean Eldridge and Chris Hughes, rich and clueless:
Eldridge tried to buy a New York congressional seat, purchasing a $5 million house in one district, then, when that didn’t work, grabbing a $2 million home in another. He outspent his opponent 3-to-1, but still lost (dashing his hopes, the Daily Beast reports, of being “the first openly gay president”). Meanwhile, Eldridge’s husband, Facebook co-founder Hughes, decided to take out his frustration on the magazine he bought, The New Republic. He fired the editor and said the tweed jacket brigade would become a “vertically integrated digital-media company.” The liberal writers who lost their minds over this made up a crazy list all its own.
Gubernatorial nominee Wendy Davis (Texas):
Approved a disparaging ad that featured images of a wheelchair like the one her opponent Greg Abbott has had to use for years since a freak accident. The ad was credited with adding five points to Abbott’s huge margin of victory.
Outgoing Sen. Kay Hagan (N.C.):
Allowed an empty chair to represent her at an October debate with challenger Thom Tillis. Tillis, who spent an hour explaining his positions and slamming Hagan, won the debate and the election.
Senate Veteran Affairs Committee Chairman Bernie Sanders (a Democrat who identifies as a Socialist, in a reversal of the usual custom):
Said the VA provides “very high quality health care, period” and that the shocking scandals surrounding it were traceable to “a concerted effort to undermine the VA” led by the “Koch Brothers and others, who want to radically change the nature of society.” So that’s why the Koches are funding all those hospitals! It’s really a roundabout way of making the VA look bad.
MIT economist Jonathan Gruber, paid architect/spokesman for ObamaCare:
Tapes emerged of him saying that only the stupidity of American voters allowed ObamaCare to pass. Then, in congressional testimony, suffered an unfortunate public episode of schizophrenia as he called himself a liar for all the times he’d previously said he helped write ObamaCare.
Outgoing Sen. Mary Landrieu (La.):
Locked in a fight for her political life, in the final days of her campaign she called her own constituents racists and sexists. About President Obama, she said he was unpopular in her state because “The South has not always been the friendliest place for African-Americans. It’s been a difficult time for the president to present himself in a very positive light as a leader.” About herself she said, “It’s not always been a good place for women to present ourselves. It’s more of a conservative place.” Maybe Landrieu should have run someplace like Massachusetts, where the party of Obama is popular and Martha Coakley easily won the governor’s . . . whoops, wait. No, she didn’t.
UN Ambassador Samantha Power:
Tweeted that “Daniel Pearl’s story is reminder that individual accountability & reconciliation are required to break cycles of violence.” Either that or it’s a reminder that murderous anti-Semitic Islamist fanatics should be broken into as many pieces as possible. But the quote is perfectly sane if Power is hoping her next job will be al Qaeda ambassador to the UN.
Outgoing Democratic Congressional Committee Chairman and Rep. Steve Israel (N.Y.):
Sent out a string of increasingly deranged fundraising emails that sounded as if they were coming from a guy who was strapped to the wall in Madame de Sade’s Torture Dungeon and maybe even enjoying it, featuring subject lines such as “CRIPPLING blow,” “DEVASTATING defeat,” “EVISCERATED,” “HORRIFYING,” “HUMILIATING” and “WHOA.” Israel put his gift for hyperbole to use when he wrote his first novel, “The Global War on Morris.” He said he was inspired to pursue fiction by things he heard while sitting in on national security briefings. Good to know that those are useful for something.
House Minority Leader Nancy Pelosi:
After Republican Rep. Tom Marino gave a speech mentioning that Pelosi had done nothing on immigration reform when she ruled the House, an enraged Pelosi chased him down two aisles, gesturing wildly and hurling imprecations until a group of fellow lawmakers intervened. Said “Democrats are not fear mongers” but “Civilization as we know it would be in jeopardy if Republicans win the Senate.” Right. Because if, say, the minimum wage or gun laws stay the way they are right now, the Book of Revelation kicks into effect.
Outgoing Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid:
Once muttered the words “Koch Brothers” 27 times in a speech. Said the Koch Brothers are “one of the main causes of [climate change]. Not a cause, one of the main causes.” Koch Industries is responsible for one-third of 1 percent of the carbon emissions in one country. It’s like saying Scranton is one of the main cities in the country.
Outgoing Sen. Mark Udall (Colo.):
Approved an attack ad that said opponent Cory Gardner was secretly waging an “eight-year crusade that would ban birth control.” If so, calling for selling the Pill over the counter (as Gardner did) was a funny way to go about it.
First Lady Michelle Obama:
“There’s too much money in politics . . . Here is something you can do right now today to make a difference, and that is to write a big, fat check.”
President-in-Waiting Hillary Clinton:
Defined “smart power” as “Showing respect, even for one’s enemies, trying to understand and insofar as psychologically possible, empathize with their perspective and point of view.” Hey, Muhammad, I feel your pain. Tell me, does your wrist ache from slitting that guy’s throat?