Two months ago, I initiated a lifestyle change. For the first time in my life, i work out at the gym a minimum of three days a week, and I track my nutrition daily using an app called MyFitnessPal. I recently lost my 20th pound, and a couple of weeks back, I ran a complete mile without stopping to pass out and/or cry.
I still think fitness and health are the worst, but I’ve been able to come this far thanks to some advice written by Dave Zinczenko, former editor of “Men’s Health,” who has preached that the path to sticking to your plan is to allow one scheduled cheat day per week. (You’re supposed to ease your way into only one cheat meal per week after the first few weeks, but what am I, Superman?)
Following his wisdom, I’ve begun to appreciate the greasy, sugary, fatty, wonderful food I love all the more, now. Each week, I plot out what I’ll gorge on that Saturday. Like a donkey being led by a carrot on a stick, I survive the treadmill with visions of dancing fried chickens.
But which of these gluttonous indulgences really live up to my fantasies? Here, I set out to discover which of my most craved delights are truly the most satisfying.
Belly Bomb
The Cheat: Peanut-butter burger with hand-cut fries and a side of chipotle sauce ($11.95)
Where: Harlem Public, 3612 Broadway; 212-939-9404, harlempublic.com
Satisfaction Level: 4
Why: A twist on a classic, this burger is made from a blend of short rib, chuck and brisket, then topped with creamy, warm peanut butter, thick brown-sugar bacon and white Cheddar. Served on a brioche roll stamped with the bar’s logo, the burger is a serious mouthful that satiates to the max. It’s paired with hand-cut fries and a smooth, not-too-spicy chipotle sauce to dip them in, I couldn’t eat anything else that day.
Square Meal
The Cheat: Coconut cream square yeast doughnut ($3.50) with a bottle of whole milk ($2.50)
Where: Doughnut Plant, 220 W. 23rd St.; 212-675-9100, doughnutplant.com
Satisfaction Level: 2
Why: The fluffy, sinfully sweet coconut cream doughnut is the Mercedes-Benz of pastries. Its fun, square shape means the cream filling hits your mouth in every bite. Unfortunately, it’s so good, I scarfed it down in a matter of seconds — along with a bottle of creamy Battenkill Valley whole milk. I was left still wanting to sample all of the other mouthwatering doughnuts on display, including the crème brûlée doughnut and the chocolate-chip-cookie cake doughnut.
Fried & True
The Cheat: Classic crunchy chicken fingers ($7 for three) with Sticky’s sauce and truffle fries ($4) with balsamic ketchup
Where: Sticky’s Finger Joint, 31 W. Eighth St.; 212-777-7131, stickysfingerjoint.com
Satisfaction Level: 4
Why: The impeccably seasoned strips are made from fresh, antibiotic- and hormone-free chicken, with a crust as crunchy as the meat is tender. The house sauce, an Alabama-style white barbecue, makes for a nice companion, and the truffle fries seem made to be dipped in the tang of the balsamic vinegar-infused ketchup. With this many flavors, you’re hitting every taste bud angle — those cravings don’t stand a chance of overtaking you during the week.
Doggone Diet
The Cheat: The Chihuahua, a bacon-wrapped hot dog with sour cream and avocado ($5)
Where: Crif Dogs, 113 St. Marks Place; 212-614-2728, crifdogs.com
Satisfaction Level: 2
Why: The standout here is the who-would-have-thought-to-try-that Chihuahua dog, which pairs avocado and sour cream with a bacon-wrapped dog. The problem is, humans can notoriously consume mass amounts of hot dogs — a certain contest comes to mind. As good as this was, it didn’t fill me up. I was ready to try several others on the menu. Spoiler alert: I did.
N’ice Try
The Cheat: Peanut-butter gelato pop dipped in milk chocolate with coconut ($4.99)
Where: Popbar, 5 Car- mine St.; 212-255-4874, popbar.com
Satisfaction Level: 3
Why: Patrons choose a gelato or sorbet base that gets dipped in your choice of coating and top- pings. I go for the peanut-butter gelato covered in coconut and dipped in milk chocolate. It’s intensely rich, and is guaranteed to ward off sweet-tooth bad behavior for the next few days.
Satisfaction chart:
4: I am perfectly fine with eating nothing but lettuce for the next six days
3: I am content, but when’s my next snack?
2: I could still eat a Big Mac
1: I still feel like I haven’t eaten