Oh no… The Teva is making a bedazzled comeback

It’s no secret that “crunchy” footwear has steadily been making a soft-padded comeback: The Birkenstock was the sleeper hit sandal of summer 2013 (the Olsens wear theirs with socks), and its less clunky distant cousin — the Teva — has its sights set on taking the lead as soon as sandal weather is in full swing.

Yes, the rubber and Velcro-trimmed sandal that had its megamoment in the ’90s is making a comeback on a fashionista near you.

But how? you might ask. And more importantly…why?

The Teva is a sport sandal. It’s designed for people who enjoy hikes and don’t mind a little dirt. It’s not designed for fashion bloggers looking to style it with an embellished 3.1 Phillip Lim bomber jacket while posing in a romanticized urban landscape.

The writing was on the wall back in September, when both Marc Jacobs’ and Prada’s Spring 2014 runway shows showed luxe variations on the sandal’s signature silhouette: Jacobs’ were black sequin-trimmed with matching flower buds, while Miuccia went bold with primary blue and yellow flat platforms smattered with emerald green gems. Spectacular (and for a fashion geek like me, thought-provoking) on the runway, but in real life? Not so flattering.

Since both designers instantly cause mass hysteria among their die-hard followers, I shouldn’t be surprised to see that the trend has already trickled down to the teen set: The May issue of Teen Vogue has a DIY feature on how to bedazzle the Teva.

Even Opening Ceremony — a retailer branded as the ultimate beacon of cool — is set to launch a collaboration with the 30-year-old sandal brand. (It hits stores May 23, FYI.)

Which got me thinking: Just because something is “in” doesn’t make it right. Right?

As a fashion editor who has styled countless shoots, I’ve become fearless in my approach to style, both on set and in my own aesthetic. All preconceived notions of trends are tossed out the window because I’ll try anything, just to see if it works. Lingerie as day wear? Been there. Crop tops? Done that. Those crazy Prada flame heels from Spring 2012? Own ’em — and wear ’em on regular rotation. What I’ve learned is that experimentation is the key to evolving a style that is exclusively my own.

Part of me blames normcore for the Teva revival: Why is there such an obsession with not looking put together? With being “normal?” (What is normal, anyway?) With looking just like everyone else? As a born-and-bred Midwesterner who’s seen the real deal, let me assure you: There is nothing hip about intentionally pairing “mom” jeans and a zip-up sweatshirt with Skechers in order to make an “anti-fashion” fashion statement.

The irony is, I used to big-time lust after the Teva.

I spent 12 years attending a private school where it was do-or-die to own the latest and greatest trendwise, and as soon as I spotted all of my peers padding around in their patterned Tevas, I became a preteen obsessed. My mother (who is my personal style icon) refused to give in to my pleas for a pair, mostly because she was horrified by their unflattering shape. But more importantly, she challenged, “Why would you want to dress like everyone else? Especially if it makes you look…like that?” She remained resolute. And I evolved past needing what everyone else was wearing, and learned to instead mix and match trends that suit my mood, my vibe, myself. Because really, there’s something pretty special about not rocking the norm.