Phil Mushnick

Phil Mushnick

NHL

Nonsense leads off in MLB broadcasts

As Homer Simpson says, “If there’s one thing I don’t like being taught, it’s a lesson!”

Saturday, during Yankees-White Sox on YES, a flabbergasted Michael Kay noted Rockies third baseman Nolan Arenado had been placed on the disabled list with a broken finger — broken while sliding head-first into second. Kay said he doesn’t get it, how MLBers choose to slide headfirst, needlessly imperiling their careers.

Amen. But senseless is MLB’s new norm. It went unmentioned — and likely unknown by Kay, at the time — Arenado wouldn’t have had to slide had he run the entire way on a shot off the wall in left.

In town with the Dodgers last week was Matt Kemp, 2011 MVP runner-up who missed 89 games last season with ankle surgery. While that’s regularly noted by local media, its particulars are never addressed:

On a chopper between first and second, Kemp, on third, jogged toward the plate, presuming there would be no play on him. When the throw was made to the plate, Kemp, who should have easily scored, standing, turned it on too late. His awkward slide wrecked his ankle.

Got that? A star missed 89 games because he didn’t bother to run to the next base! Crazy, but that’s now standard MLB play.

Over the weekend, the Cubs named Manny Ramirez a Triple-A player/coach. Hmm, now what advice could he provide aspiring big leaguers?

How to pose at home plate? How to turn doubles into singles, in playoff games, too? How to assault a 65-year-old traveling secretary for being unable to meet a late request to leave 16 tickets for buddies? Tips on how to be consistently, conspicuously, unconditionally selfish?

Sense? Sunday 8 p.m. starts in April in Boston and New York, 40 bucks to park, a save rule that awards the same grade — an A — for one inning of pitching, perfect through atrocious save totals soon used for reference and insight by repeat-anything media?

Wednesday during Dodgers-Mets, an SNY graphic on L.A. starter Zach Greinke: “No more than two runs allowed in any of last 21 starts, longest streak in MLB history.” Wow!

Know how many complete games Greinke has pitched in the last four seasons? One. He’s a six-to-seven-innings starter. Yet, he has surpassed the greatest of greats, including those who regularly pitched nine innings and occasionally allowed three runs. Bob Gibson threw 28 complete games in 1968 — and again in ’69!

Sense? Tuesday night, with the Dodgers in town, TV couldn’t help but show the first six rows behind the plate — best seats in the Mets’ house — went empty. The Mets and Yankees have that in common. At the same time, the Yankees were playing the last-place Cubs at Wrigley. Not an empty seat in sight.

Headfirst slides? Why not? Knock yourselves out.

‘Wild Thing’ really needs calming down

Here’s hoping MLB Network didn’t just suspend Mitch “Wild Thing” Williams for his extreme misconduct at his 10-year-old’s ballgame, but it insisted that he get legit help.

Former MLB pitcher Mitch Williams got into a disagreement with an umpire at his 10-year-old son’s baseball game.Twitter/@HitMeSEO

Kevin Williams — no relation to Mitch — is Director of the (Jersey) Shore Sports Network. In March, he was working a girls high school basketball game that was prefaced with a heads up: Mitch’s daughter was playing; her father, already notorious for making a spectacle of himself, was seated behind her team’s bench.

Didn’t take long, said Kevin, for Mitch to start standing and screaming at the refs, establishing himself as the worst who-is-that-maniac? act in the arena. The site director was moved to threaten him with expulsion if he didn’t sit down, calm down.

If Fox’s instructions to Gus Johnson before Saturday’s Atletico Madrid-Real Madrid UEFA Cup final was to scream as if he’d been electrocuted when a goal is scored, mission accomplished!

First, Tim Brando, among the most credible and knowledgeable college play-by-players, was let go by CBS. Next, he was honored as this year’s winner of the Lindsey Nelson Award for broadcasting excellence. Now, he’s still without a TV gig. Crazy.

Graphic of the Week: During Game 3 of Pacers–Heat, ESPN felt it important for us to know the Pacers are on “a 15-2 run.” At the time, the score was 17-4.

By keeping the microphones at the benches open and live Saturday, what did NBC figure we’d hear, if not something such as the Rangers’ Brian Boyle plaint that he’d been hit “right in the bleepin’ teeth”? Or was that what NBC was hoping for?

Golf Channel’s Notah Begay, 41-year-old ex-PGA Tourist, has returned to the air after a heart attack.

Clarification/lame excuse: In my last column, I confused a Three Stooges and Abbott & Costello bit (“Niagara Falls”) with an Abbott & Costello bit (“Susquehanna Hat Co.”). Easily explained: Fifty years ago, I watched TV instead of doing my homework. Still do.

Things being what they are these days, yesterday, after hearing “alternate side of the street parking has been suspended,” I figured it had something to do with Donald Sterling.

Honoring our war dead — with radio ads

Lost-in-commercials Yankees radio Monday gratefully demonstrated its regard for Memorial Day by airing the last third of the national anthem in St. Louis. The rest was lost to ads.

And can’t pop culture can’t take off for Memorial Day? Friday’s Blackhawks-Kings game was preceded by the introduction of decorated Marine Sgt. Corey Lamel, who then, in full formal dress, stood on the ice at rigid attention while Guns N’ Roses guitarist Slash, a few feet (but miles) away, played a grinding, holiday-inappropriate national anthem. Slash didn’t even remove his funky top hat.

On Memorial Day weekend, neither the Kings nor the NHL could present a more respectful, military style anthem?

And John Amirante, before Sunday’s Habs-Rangers, who now exploits his traditional, no-frills singing of the anthem to wave a “Go-Rangers!” towel overhead, also seemed to have missed the honor-our-war dead and all of our veterans theme that’s supposed to be attached to Memorial Day.

Then again, he was playing to an in-house audience loaded with adult men who chant obscenities into kids’ ears. That’s one of those liberties we’re supposed to be thankful for on Memorial Day — freedom of expression.

On the flip side, Doc Emrick’s wonderful essay Saturday about the 90 players from the six-team NHL who served in World War II — including Red Garrett, a New York Ranger who was killed in naval action — was an expression of freedom.