Metro

Bad news ‘bares’

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You normally want to see giant mountains at a strip club — but this is ridiculous!

The Sanitation Department caused lap dances at Hell’s Kitchen jiggle joint HeadQuarters Cabaret to grind to a halt, after snow-removal workers cut the gentlemen’s club off from the outside world by dumping 15-foot-high piles of snow in front.

Strippers were forced to totter through an arctic winterscape in their stiletto heels. By the early-morning hours, the Sanitation Department had packed such massive mounds outside the mammary mecca that men couldn’t get down the street to the front door.

Even the club’s dancers weren’t hot enough to melt all the white stuff.

“Its been dead,” complained dancer Valentina Torres, 22. “As you can see, no one is here. The street is closed so we don’t even get our regular customers. Basically, this has been a wasted week. As long as the sanitation [workers] are out there, no one will come!”

The city was piling the snow near the club — on West 38th Street at 11th Avenue — because a snow-melting machine was operating there.

After midnight yester day, sanitation workers were stopping people from even trying to go down the street to the club. Club workers also re ported damage to rugs and tiles out side from the snow-moving equip ment.

“The blizzard never stopped here,” said night manager Carmine Vitolo, 37. “It’s not the act of nature; it’s the city and the Department of Sanitation choosing to melt all their snow on this one block. It’s just so bad out there. The worst thing is that Sanitation is giving us no timetable when this will clear up.

“The snow just keeps on coming and coming to the street,” he added. “Business is down 90 percent because of this. They closed the street so everyone thinks we’re closed. And it’s funny, because on snowy nights we do better than usual.”

The Sanitation Department said it had to melt snow in that section of West 38th Street because it is the site of one of the city’s biggest sewers.

“There are only certain sewer lines that can accept the water from a snow melter,” said spokeswoman Kathy Dawkins. She could not say when the melter would finish its work at the location.

Despite the city’s explanation, strippers say excuses aren’t going to put dollar bills in their g-strings.

“I come here from the Upper East Side and have to spend money on cabs, and I make nothing. Zero!” said exotic dancer Amber Tamburi, 22. “A normal night for us, we can make anywhere from, say, $500 to $1,500. And this week, we’re making nothing.”

Vitolo said he is trying to keep a humorous attitude about the trouble.

“This whole operation gives a new meaning to the term Hell’s Kitchen,” he said.

larry.celona@nypost.com