What a wild year it’s been in the worlds of books, movies, TV and theater. Teen stars getting busted for drugs, zombies conquering the tube, would-be talk show hosts being outed as Frank Sinatra’s possible illegitimate children, once-invincible stars like Johnny Depp and Will Smith bombing at the box office.
But of course, the biggest watercooler story of 2013 had to be Miley Cyrus’ performance at the MTV Video Music Awards, which found the 21-year-old former child star grinding on Robin Thicke’s leg, sticking out her tongue with abandon and getting really up close and personal with a foam finger. In that spirit, we present the “Miley Cyrus Twerk Awards,” running down the best, worst and most interesting in pop culture for 2013.
Most baffling interview that sure seemed like it was about Scientology, even if it wasn’t
Jaden and Will Smith did a bizarrely pretentious sit-down with New York magazine that found Will declaring, “At heart, I’m a physicist,” and Jaden muttering something about, “It’s, like, multidimensional mathematical.” Hail Xenu!
Second Annual “Gangnam Style” Award for Most Ubiquitous Hit That Listeners Enjoy Ironically — At First
“The Fox (What Does the Fox Say?)” was created by Norwegian comedy duo Ylvis, but the joke’s on us, because the EDM track went on to become one of the year’s biggest online — and chart — smashes.
Worst “Let’s just finish this script already and go get a donut” moment
Superman snapping General Zod’s neck at the end of “Man of Steel” was not only out of character, it reeked of laziness and uncertainty on the part of the filmmakers about how to end the movie. Even a musical number would have been better.
Most Un-Love-able restaurant closure
Roots drummer Questlove lived his dream by opening a fried chicken stand in Chelsea Market, Hybird, but was forced to shutter it just a few months later due to lack of business.
Biggest Accomplishment of the Year (Kim Kardashian division)
In October, she took a selfie in a white swimsuit, showing her bubbly backside and some sideboob. Congratulations, Kim. You’ve had an amazing year.
Most shocking overshare
Michael Douglas’ admission that he might have gotten oral cancer from, well, oral. Man, that guy’s a player even when it comes to near-fatal diseases.
Most surprising thing to be having a moment
Sign language. A fake interpreter hijacked Nelson Mandela’s funeral, while an amazing signer named Holly kept up with the Wu-Tang Clan, word for word, at Bonnaroo in June. Add that to Mayor Bloomberg’s ASL aid during last year’s Hurricane Sandy, and sign language is definitely in.
Worst way to lose your TV show
Butter-loving Southern chef Paula Deen was dumped by the Food Network in the summer after getting into a flap about her use of the N- word. Sounds like someone is going to be drowning her sorrows in a plate of deep-fried pizza!
Juiciest Broadway battle
Shia LaBeouf and Alec Baldwin got into a testy, man-slap fight during rehearsals of the play “Orphans,” causing Shia to be fired. If only there was a way they both could have lost.
Weirdest way to spend quality time with a movie star
Visitors to the Museum of Modern Art in March turned up to find Tilda Swinton asleep in an elevated glass box as part of an exhibit called “The Maybe.” Who knew we all made eight hours of MOMA-worthy art each night?
Best breaking of fashion barriers
Best proof that no promotion is the best promotion
Beyoncé released her new album with no warning at midnight on December 13, and it went on to sell 617,000 copies in the first three days alone. Good luck trying that again, though, Bey.
Worst attempt to inject life into a fading franchise
Even the trumped-up feud storyline between new “American Idol” judges Nicki Minaj and Mariah Carey couldn’t save the flagging franchise. Ratings for the 2013 finale were down 40 percent from the previous year.
The “Yes, This Story Was Heavily Covered by CNN” Award
Justin Bieber was forced to ditch his pet capuchin monkey, Mally, in Germany after bringing it on tour without the proper paperwork in March. Story at 11.
Best reunion for a boy band (or at least 80 percent of it)
When ‘N Sync got together for the MTV Video Music Awards to briefly join Justin Timberlake during his solo performance, the other four guys — what were their names? — looked elated to be there. Justin looked like he was just throwing a bone.
Most pointless Internet meme
For a few days last spring, everyone was doing the “Harlem Shake.” We’re still not sure why.
Most romantic tweet
https://twitter.com/amandabynes/status/314906707929214976
Wayward actress Amanda Bynes wrote in March, “I want @Drake to murder my vagina.” Oh, Amanda. You had us at “vagina.”
The Sixth Time’s the Charm Award
Lindsay Lohan took yet another crack at rehab. If it keeps her from making a sequel to “The Canyons,” we’re up for a seventh.
Best music video probably conceived and directed by a 15-year-old boy
There’s absolutely zero attempt to explain why there are topless models wandering around in Robin Thicke’s “Blurred Lines” video. But you watched it, didn’t you?
Worst cancellation
After seven inspired seasons, “30 Rock” went off the air in January. Couldn’t the TV gods have taken one of the “Housewives” franchises instead?
Best moment for a movie that might be OK to pass the time on a flight one day
“Argo” wins best picture at the Oscars.
Biggest thumbs down
Longtime film critic Roger Ebert passed away in April, leaving an empty seat in the balcony.
Most courageous revelation
Angelina Jolie’s announcement that she’d had an elective double mastectomy to potentially avoid breast cancer shocked the world — and encouraged women everywhere to be more vigilant about their health.
Worst moment of déjà vu
NBC announced in April that top-rated Jay Leno would be leaving “The Tonight Show” to make way for a younger upstart. Audiences scratched their heads and wondered if they’d already heard this news a bunch of times before.
Yeahhhhh, boy! Best stretching of the term “Rock and Roll”
In April, Public Enemy became just the fourth hip-hop act to be inducted into the Rock and Roll Hall of Fame. Now if only we could get Flavor Flav’s clock into the Accessories Hall of Fame.