Metro

Daily Blotter

Brooklyn

â–  Police are looking to identify a burglar who slipped into a Greenpoint apartment and swiped two laptops and two cellphones, authorities said.

The crook broke in through a bedroom window and entered the home in the vicinity of Diamond and Newell streets on July 24 just after 3:30 a.m., cops said.

The thief grabbed the electronics and fled, according to police.

Cops said the thief later used an app on one of the victim’s cellphones to buy food at a deli on Myrtle Avenue in Clinton Hill.

â–  A subway sicko was caught on video pleasuring himself aboard a train in Bensonhurst, police said.

A 27-year-old woman was on a Coney Island-bound D train near the 62nd Street station the afternoon of July 19 when she noticed the pervert masturbating next to her, authorities said.

The straphanger used her cellphone to video the creep, who tried to hide his masturbating with a bag over his lap, according to cops.

Police are trying to identify the suspect, who is believed to be about 40 years old, 5-foot-6 and 150 pounds.


Manhattan

■ A thief charged with breaking into two designer clothing boutiques in the West Village was given a shiny accessory by cops — a set of handcuffs.

Howard Parker, 50, threw cobblestones into the storefront windows of the Hotoveli and A.P.C. stores, both on West Fourth Street, on Aug. 20 at about 2:30 a.m., cops said.

Parker was collared allegedly trying to steal high-end clothing by a cop who responded to the scene. He was charged with burglary.

â–  A man choked another bar patron during a booze-fueled fight in Tribeca, sources said.

Ryan Grissett, 32, allegedly pummeled the 32-year-old victim at the Raccoon Lodge on Warren Street on aug. 6 at about 8 p.m., sources added.

Griessett allegedly first punched the victim in the head seven or eight times and then wrapped his hands around the man’s neck, sources added.

The victim suffered from pain and swelling on the left side of his face, leaving him light-headed and unable to breathe, sources added.

When police arrived, the alleged attacker resisted arrest by refusing to be handcuffed and trying to stop cops from putting him in the police car, sources said.

Grissett was charged with assault with intent to cause injury, obstruction of breathing, harassment, attempted assault and resisting arrest, court records state.

â–  Oh, crap!

A Chelsea man came home Aug. 19 around 6 p.m. to find his apartment door smeared with feces, sources said.

Police are still looking for the culprit of the Tenth Avenue skeeze-out.

â–  A woman was sexually assaulted inside her West Village apartment building, cops said.

Anthony Thomas, 27, was waiting huddled in the stairway of the victim’s building on Grove Street near Bedford Street last Saturday at about 4:40 a.m., cops said.

As the 28-year-old victim was trying to enter her apartment, the creep grinded his genitals against her buttocks, cops said.

Thomas was arrested and charged with forcible touching and sexual abuse.

He was released on $4,000 bond.


 Staten Island

â–  These guys need to relax.

The zen vibe at a Dongan Hills spa was killed when three hammer-wielding brutes came in and robbed the place, authorities said.

The goons burst into the New Royal Spa on North Railroad Avenue near Garretson Avenue on Aug. 20 at at 6:20 p.m., threatened an employee with the tool, and made off with $600 in cash, police said.

All three suspects are at large.

One of the suspects wore a white baseball cap with a yellow brim, a black shirt, and black pants.

A bearded accomplice wore a black hoodie and dark pants, police said.

The third suspect wore a white baseball cap, a purple T-shirt and light-colored shorts.

â–  Cops identified an alleged penny-ante thief who they say held up an Elm Park bank for a mere $55.

Mark Leaks Jr., 37, passed a demand note to a teller at the TD branch on Forest Avenue near Crystal Avenue on Aug. 18 just after 5 p.m., according police.

The worker handed over the small amount and the suspect fled, cops added.