“The Restaurant” finale [No rating]
Sunday night at 10 on Ch. 4/NBC
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IF you’ve been waiting for the finale of “The Restaurant” forever – or about as long as it took me to get a meatball at Rocco’s – help is on the way.
This Sunday night, Rocco and the wait staff you’ve come to know and love – and loathe – will be back bringing with them an end to their angsting, agitating and agonizing.
But what’s a finale without a big, fat, happy Hollywood ending? Nothing – that’s what.
While I won’t give it away, I will tell you to expect a kind of “Rocky” ending for Rocco.
And don’t wait for the twist that the promos keep promising, because it’s not all that much of a twist.
I hate to be the one to tell you this – you just can’t rely on everything you hear on television.
But, rest easy – nobody gets fired, nobody gets a Vespa, and nobody runs away with Rocco, although the number of women who’d like to are legion.
“Final twist” aside, you’ll hear Rocco declare that “flirting is a normal thing in a restaurant.” Good, I just wish it didn’t have to extend to this creepy nine-(or so)-year-old boy who relentlessly hits on Natalie. The kid throws out more lines than a fisherman on a good day. I have the feeling he’s set up to throw out the lines, because it’s all so slick – but it’s also revolting to see a kid this aggressive.
It’s all supposed to be funny, but considering that the kid shows zero respect for an adult woman, it’s pretty weird. All that’s missing are an open shirt and chains. Eeeeeyewww.
Then there’s the couple who gets engaged on the show.
I was told the night I was there that a couple was getting engaged, and when I asked how they managed to get a reservation, I was told that the guy promised to propose on camera. So much for reality. Even that is weird.
The couple seems to have nothing to say to each other and after she gets the ring, after everybody gets weepy, she then declares, “I can get fat now! I don’t have to shave my legs anymore!” Whew.
The ending is a mushy love fest with staffers declaring, “We made history here! We have this bonding now!”
History? Well, some of them do have their own Web sites now, if that means anything.
Now that I’ve given the joint more press than their press agent could have dreamed of, I hope I can get a reservation when I call.
I hear they’re even serving the food piping hot now!