Sure, Siri can take dictation and give directions, play a requested song and call up a particular e-mail. And “she” does it all politely — most of the time. But the iPhone virtual assistant also has developed quite the sense of humor since debuting in 2011.
Apple engineers built in a series of Easter eggs into Siri’s programming, which means certain questions, requests or statements trigger humorous — and sometimes catty — responses. She can even keep up with the geekiest “Monty Python” or “Star Wars” fan. Users have reported finding dozens of quips, and Apple has hinted that there are potentially several more waiting to be unlocked. With rumors of a summer iPhone 6 release heating up, here are a collection of the best Siri responses:
“Do you like hockey?”
“No. The only hat trick I know involves a rabbit.”
“Read me a poem, Siri.”
“Roses are red/violets are blue/Haven’t you got/anything better to do?”
“Tell me a joke.”
“I don’t think you’d understand a joke in my language. They’re not so funny, anyway.”
“What is the meaning of life?”
“Life: a principle or force that is considered to underlie the distinctive quality of animate beings. I guess that includes me.”
“Are you ‘Her’?”
“Is that you, Joaquin?”
“What are you wearing?”
“Let’s see . . . OK, just as I thought . . . the same as yesterday.”
“Siri, open the pod bay doors.”
[said in a monotone] “I’m sorry, I’m afraid I can’t do that.
Are you happy now?”
“Go make me a sandwich.”
“I’m not permitted to prepare food.”
“It’s my birthday!”
“Happy birthday to you, happy birthday to you . . . oh, sorry, that song is copyrighted.”
“Who’s on first?”
“Correct. Who is on first.”
“Show me your boobs.”
“What makes you think . . . nevermind.”
“Beam me up, Scotty!”
“OK. Stand still.”
“What’s your favorite movie?”
“I’ve heard that ‘Blade Runner’ is a very realistic and sensitive depiction of intelligent assistants.”
“What’s your favorite movie quote?”
“I don’t really have a favorite. But I hear that ‘2001: A Space Odyssey’ got some good reviews.”
“How much wood could a woodchuck chuck if a woodchuck could chuck wood?”
“I imagine that groundhogs would prefer a different question for a change.”
“Who’s your favorite baseball team?”
“I always like to root for the underdog. I guess that makes me a fan of the Astros right now.”
“Knock knock.”
“Knock knock. Who’s there? Siri. Siri who? Siri doesn’t do knock-knock jokes.”
“Do you think I’ll ever find true love?”
“I think, therefore I am. But let’s not put Descartes before the horse.”
“Who let the dogs out?”
“Who? Who? Who? Who? Who?”