Let’s see, got the drinks, the hors d’oeuvres, the napkins. All that’s missing for the holiday party is the gossip, so here goes:
US Weekly has tongues wagging with its “exclusive” photos of reality TV star Kim Kardashian frolicking on the beach in an itsy-bitsy white bikini. “My body is back! No gimmicks, no surgery,” US screams at us from the cover. Only, the story behind the story is even more tantalizing than Kim’s ample rear. The Post’s Page Six has reported that the photos were surgically altered using Hollywood’s favorite technology: Photoshop. When asked about the photos on “Extra,” Kim said she was hanging out on the beach with friends and “ran back inside” when they saw the paparazzi. Page Six tells a more likely story, which is that Kim paid a professional photographer to take the pics and airbrush them before auctioning them off to the highest bidder. No gimmicks, eh?
OK! magazine lures us in with its tale of more heartbreak for heartbreak honey Jennifer Aniston. After weeks of fighting with fiancé Justin Theroux about where to live (NY or LA), Jen has decided to call it off. “She’s decided she doesn’t need a partner to raise a baby,” one insider told the gossip rag. Of course, we just read about Jen and Justin’s awesome Christmas bash in US weekly. That was on Dec. 8 and OK! has them breaking up over Thanksgiving. What gives? Perhaps like Kim’s beach shots, US Weekly’s photo of Jennifer and Justin happily cuddling in their holiday party clothes was just more of the Hollywood illusion machine. Then again, breaking up over which coast to live on when you can afford to live on both in style seems a little shallow, but hey — isn’t that why we read these magazines in the first place? To judge?
Life & Style also plasters the Jen and Justin sob story on its December cover, but it spins a much better tale of how the romance soured so suddenly. According to L&S, it’s not just where to live that’s been dragging Jen down. Justin seems removed “emotionally.” He’s been living here since November, even though his new series, “The Leftovers,” doesn’t start filming until February, the mag says. Sure, they were together recently shopping for a tree, but they didn’t look happy! L&S also offers juicy insights into Angelina Jolie’s weight problem and the new and improved look taken on by Prince Harry’s girlfriend. Cressida Bonas wants so much to be a princess she’s giving up her dancing career to become a teacher — until the wedding, that is.
If you’re looking for a true heartbreak story, forget about Jen and Justin and pick up the latest copy of People. Its cover story about the reality star Jennifer Arnold’s battle with a rare and rapidly growing cancer will have you reaching for the handkerchief in no time. Arnold and her husband Bill Klein are stars on TLC’s “The Little Couple,” which has chronicled their marriage and travails with pregnancy afterward. Turns out Arnold’s pregnancy earlier this year, which didn’t work out, resulted in a rare form of cancer that results from the fetus’ leftover cells. Of course, we question People’s decision to put both this story and a remembrance to Nelson Mandela on its cover. Since when has People started competing with real news mags?
New York’s “Reasons to Love New York” offers a host of amusing things that make the city one of the kookiest but most lovable places to live. For instance, New York claims to have the tastiest garbage — there’s someone who inventoried it — and we’ve got the moxie to stand on line for hours to try a cross-bred donu.
Pope Francis figures large in this month’s New Yorker, possibly because there’s this huge religious festival coming up on Dec. 25. The title has its own version of Time’s Person the Year, called “Game-Changers.” Editor David Remnick presents a fascinating portrayal of the working women of Saudi Arabia’s luxury department stores. The subjects talk about how much they love to work and how they lost their identities staying at home all day.
The pope is Time’s pick for Person of the Year, edging out, according to Editor Nancy Gibbs, Edward Snowden. Don’t get us going on that one. The magazine of record also turned out a handsome commemorative edition to mark Mandela’s passing that’s chock full of glossy imagery. The special keepsake features articles by rocker Bono and actor Morgan Freeman and a strange photo of some tribal boys waiting, legs open, for a nurse after being circumcised.