‘Killer Hair’: Great title, better premise.
June 21, Lifetime
A fashion reporter turns detective to solve a series of murders in a beauty salon. And it co-stars Mark Consuelos, Kelly Ripa’s husband and Oprah pal. Lacey Smithsonian gets all Sherlock Holmes-ish when customers start showing up bludgeoned by blow dryers and poisoned by toxic highlights. As the bodies start piling up, the salon’s regular customers become suspects. Will she clash with the paper’s crime reporter (Consuelos), who thinks the story belongs to him? Will any of the people be able to show their faces in public again?
‘Drop Dead Diva’: Every woman’s revenge fanatsy
July 12, Lifetime
A shallow, dumb-as-a-bunny model dies . . . and comes back as a plus-sized female lawyer. Deb (played Brooke D’Orsay) is killed in a car accident but her soul returns in the body of a brilliant, thoughtful and — horror of all horrors — fat lawyer named Jane (played by Brooke Elliott). Deb (in Jane’s body) finds herself juggling cases while secretly trying to reconnect with her grieving boyfriend (Jackson Hurst). A summer parable — just in time for swimsuit anxiety season — about the importance of beauty and brains.
‘Dance Your Ass Off’/’More To Love’: Fat dating/Fat dancing
June 29, Oxygen/ July 28, Fox
One of the advantages of appearing on “Dancing with the Stars” — besides offers to host cable TV reality shows — is the sudden weight loss contestants are always talking about. So why not a show that combines “Biggest Loser” and “DWTS”? Hosted by plus-size Tony-winner (and “DWTS” alum) Marissa Jarrett Winokur, the series pairs pro dancers with hefty amateurs doing everything from hip-hop and ballroom to pole dancing. Weekly weight loss and dance scores combine to determine who gets sent home. Meanwhile, Fox’s ode to chubby chasing, “More to Love,” from executive producer Mike Fleiss (“The Bachelor”) aims to create a new reality TV category, the inspirational dating show. An average Joe goes out on the town with a bevy of confident and curvy women.
‘Hung’: Size does matter.
June 28, HBO
A down-and-out basketball coach’s best chance of fixing up his life is to use what God gave him. HBO is hanging this comedy (starring Thomas Jane) from the most-flaccid premise we’ve ever heard. The coach decides to pimp himself out as a stud service after his wife (Anne Heche) leaves him for her dermatologist and the children decide to move in with her. Good choice, kids.
‘Impact’: When the moon hits the earth like a big pizza pie, that’s a miniseries!
June 21, ABC
The solar system is so out of whack in this alarmist two-night movie about the moon threatening to crash into the Earth. And, oh yeah, destroy all life with it. A small band of international astronauts, scientists and soldiers, played by actors who need new agents, band together to stop this cosmic calamity. Starring David James Elliott, James Cromwell and Natasha Henstridge.
‘Sex Decoy: Love Stings’: His cheatin’ heart.
Airing now, Saturdays at 10 p.m., Fox Reality
Sandra Hope, manager of Mate Check Private Investigations, is the star of this tempting reality hour. She recruits her three daughters into her private investigation business which specializes in testing would-be adulterous men. “This is a family business,” says Sandra on the first episode.” Oh, and did we mention that two of the three daughters are strippers?