Metro

Yule be back for Christmas

There are signs that Christ is on the come back trail in this city. Moses, too, is on the re bound.

Say it now, loud and proud — Merry Christmas! Happy Hanukkah! And a brilliant Kwanzaa!

Each year at this time, I am compelled to comment on the War on Christmas. A silly season policed by lawyers and enabled by frightened politicians and business types who strip the holidays of spiritual messages such as faith and love, in favor of safe spending and empty, neutral speech.

So frightened of the ACLU were stores, such as The Gap and Victoria’s Secret, greeters were instructed to remove any reference to Christmas or Hanukkah, in favor of a benign “happy holidays.” Sillier, religious music was banned more than six years ago from school concerts in Maplewood, NJ, a case that wound its way through the courts — and was recently settled in favor of nuking such potentially toxic tunes as “Silent Night” and “Dreidel, Dreidel” from the consciousness of kids.

Just last week, a Christmas tree was removed from a Texas JPMorgan Chase branch, after the shrub was deemed threatening by bank grinches.

But the most iconic example of hostility to religion had to be the change of name more than a year ago of the Rockefeller Center Christmas Tree — to the Rockefeller Center Tree. A move that, one Rock insider complained, was made in a lame effort not to offend . . . anyone.

The handful of tourists I spoke with were miffed.

“It seems rather mean-spirited,” said one. She was Jewish.

But the times, they are a-changing. Suddenly this year, Christmas is back! The word has been restored to the “Rockefeller Christmas Tree.”

“That’s certainly welcome,” said Myrna Decker of Queens.

The people have spoken, and they won’t be ignored. The American Family Association, which tracks holiday advertising, noted that the mention of “Christmas,” which was used in ads by just 20 percent of the nation’s top 100 companies a few years ago, has soared — urged on by consumers who want to be reminded that family, Jesus and Moses are part of the mix as they plunk down plastic.

Now, a whopping 80 percent of retailers use the once-verboten religious references.

“We’ve seen almost a complete flip,” said Randy Sharp, AFA’s special-projects director.

In Philadelphia last week, the word “Christmas” was whacked from the German Christmas Village, leaving the attraction with the limp name “Holiday Village.” But then, some 1,800 e-mails of protest bombarded the mayor’s office. Within hours, Mayor Michael Nutter restored Christmas.

“There’s a renewed interest on the part of the public to take a pro-Christmas stance,” said the Catholic League’s Bill Donohue. “I’ve seen people more aggressive and defiant and assertive.”

Still, there exists a groundswell of discontent by a troupe that has chosen the holiday season to push its religion: atheism.

The Freedom from Religion Foundation protests the public display of creches, as is their right. But the irreligious group sees nothing hypocritical about displays that push its own belief system. Like the billboard at the Lincoln Tunnel that blasts, “You KNOW It’s a Myth.” And one, set for Denver that says, “Yes Virginia, There Is No God.”

“It’s empowering for our membership to stand or drive by and see your personal views on rejecting religion,” said Freedom co-President Annie Laurie Gaylor. “More people have been killed in the name of an imaginary deity than for any other reason.”

Imaginary or real, God-fearing folks have the atheists outnumbered. After a full day of protest from angry customers, JPMorgan Chase in Texas relented.

“The tree is going back up,” said a spokesman. It’s only right.

A legacy of uselessness

David Paterson is lost. The accidental governor said in a radio interview that public opinion turned against him not because of his failings, but because folks laughed at his bumbling depiction on “Saturday Night Live.”

He also said serving 2½ years as chief executive, with toadies meeting his every whim, has made him soft. And disabled.

“I’m actually thinking I’m going to have to go back to one of the services for the blind and be retrained,” he told WFAN.

Paterson was right that Albany is a swamp. But he was too weak and scandal-prone to do anything to drain it. This will be Paterson’s epitaph: He filled the seat. He whined. He got out of the way.

Not one of her greatest hits

I’m already in mourning for Britney Spears.

The fallen pop princess’ friend and husband for 55 hours, Jason Alexander, has peddled a story — backed up by taped phone conversations — that Britney got walloped, twice, by boyfriend and agent Jason Trawick. I don’t know what’s sicker — a mother who returns to a guy for a second black eye, or a greedy pal who pretends he just wants to help. Britney’s people and Trawick’s deny it. But Alexander is sticking to the story.

We’ve watched Britney grow up and then unravel. But whether you’re rich, poor or “country” — Britney’s euphemism for “redneck” — there is no reason to accept repeated beatings. None.


Dead as King Tut

Steve Martin is a brilliant comedian. But a boring civilian. So boring, the 92nd Street Y took an unheard-of step and offered $50 refunds to all 900 people who watched his stink-bomb interview last week.

I met Martin once in LA, and he failed to look up from his shoes or as much as grunt. His companions, including Eric Idle, covered for him by chatting madly. Now, the world knows that the wild and crazy guy can’t handle reality. Sad.

Can’t jail me – i’m an athlete

Former Yankee Jim Leyritz drove drunk in Florida and fatally struck a woman in another car. Then last week, Leyritz was sentenced to a year’s probation and a $500 fine. Why not just ship the guy to a day spa?

His lawyers, by the way, blamed the dead woman, who’d also been drinking.

Every Leyritz story essentially excuses the degenerate’s mistake, pointing out that Leyritz hit a monster home run that helped the Yankees win the 1996 World Series. Leyritz joins Mets pitcher Francisco Rodriguez, who escaped jail after beating the father of his girlfriend.

There is justice. And there is athletes’ justice.

Farewell, friend

Big, brassy and blunt, Elaine Kaufman made the lowliest reporter and brightest A-lister feel special and safe in the East Side saloon over which she reigned. Now she is gone.I miss her.