Sports

Larry evicted from yet another town

A failure to approach, much less reach expectations, however impractical they may be, is bound to get authority figures fired sooner than later, which is precisely why Larry Brown again is on relocation and Kurt Rambis has a job for life.

Any other NBA owner other than Donald Sterling and James Dolan would’ve fired himself for incapacitating his team the way Michael Jordan frustrated the Bobcats’ progress this past summer. Instead, Next Town Brown took the well-researched fall . . . getting snuffed out on Tobacco Road, apparently with the full support of the surgeon general.

So, less than a half season after Brown escorted the franchise to its first after party and first winning record (44-38) since its 2004 inception, he is now being held accountable for the team’s 9-19 stain in the standings, inability to score (60s, 70s, 80s and low 90s in losing six of last seven), draw fewer witnesses than three-fourths of the league and make sure Gerald Wallace stays healthy.

As we’ve kinda detected from Brown’s previous pit stops, the winning hides the whining. Losing (recheck all previous pit stops) does not. Recently, in no particular order, he sniveled a sliver about the departures of Raymond Felton, Tyson Chandler, high-tops, and the Automat.

In the spirit of the season, all of the above added up to an excommunication, though the uninformedinsist Brown resigned and forfeited $8 million.

“Trust me, Larry did not quit,” testifies someone in the proverbial room.

Had it been true, Next Town’s assistants, including his older brother, Herb, would have elevated loyalty to a new exemplar by joining him on the unemployment line.

Interim Paul Silas is being permitted to assemble his own aides, as long as he hires Jordan’s partners in pleasure and punishment. Charles Oakley already is on board. Wide World Wes and cherished au pair re Ahmad Rashard can’t be far behind.

A new coaching staff should turn things around pronto for the Bobcats. In the meantime, maybe I missed it, but shouldn’t Jordan be accepting a tinge of blame for his team’s plunge?

Forget about the fact (as I have) he drafted Adam Morrison in 2006 with the third overall pick, while proclaiming him “the next Reggie Miller.” Anyone could’ve made that boo-boo, I suppose. Let’s get more current than that.

Jordan let Felton (12.1 points, 5.6 assists) fade into free agency without so much as an offer — a response, no doubt, to Jameer Nelson manhandling his counterpoint in the first round? He also channeled Chandler to Dallas during the offseason, simply to save $12.6 million; Erick Dampier (and his largely non-guaranteed $13.078 contract) was acquired and subsequently waived.

Money pinching had to be Jordan’s sole reason for giveaway, because, obviously, he got nothing back in return for his team’s starting center, who, by the way was good enough to make Team USA’s gold-medal winning outfit and is a primary reason the Mavericks are 23-5. Last week Dirk Nowitzki compared Chandler’s defensive talents to Kevin Garnett’s.

Whoops, I apologize; Jordan was able to negotiate the release of Eduardo Najera ($3M/ $2.7M) and Matt Carroll ($4.3M/$3.9M/$3.5M) from Mark Cuban’s cushy domain . . . neither of whom are incapable of contributing to a shanty team.

In the final analysis, organizations lose playoff position not players.

Jerry Krause must be in hysterics.

As for Next Town Brown, the count now droops at nine NBA franchises visited and vacated by his welcome wagon. The lone suspense is whether any of the remaining 21 before contraction will take his call.

Having spent some time around Brown since watching him play high-school ball against Artie Heyman (Long Beach vs. Oceanside), he always has a job on tap. I’ve got a pesky hunch his ancient agent Joe Glass began calling around the league about possible jobs the day after his client signed with the Bobcats.

Then again, more likely the same day.

My Paper Clips are 7 ½ games removed from the eighth Western Conference playoff spot. Vinny Del Negro should be very nervous and very aware who’s creeping ’round Sterling’s back stairs.

Rambis, on the other hand, has no need to worry. The brains behind the Timberwolves could lose the next 19 games in a row and still not be job jeopardy.

After an acceptable 15-67 debut season, Rambis is now 23-91 and is 8-53 in his last 61 despite having the NBA’s leading rebounder (15.6 in addition to 20.9 points) at his disposal. At first Rambis didn’t know what to do with Kevin Love so he played him as little as intellectually possible. This season it was more of the same until Love busted out nightly with such inhuman efforts his coach couldn’t privately indict him any longer for not working hard enough.

Just when I thought I was beyond being stunned by Rambis’ coaching, he removed Love with 4:07 left in Wednesday’s 112-107 loss to the Jazz when he picked up his fifth foul . . . and inserted Darko Milicic who had five fouls. T’Wolves led 97-93. By the time, Love (25 & 19) got back in at the 1:58 mark, the score was tied 101-101 . . . but the game was over.

I guess Rambis has the stats to support that move . . . that the average NBA player averages 24 fouls per 48 minutes.

This just in from column chondriac Richie Kalikow: “You’re going to need a complex algorithm to determine whether Larry Brown or Larry King has severed more relationships.”

peter.vecsey@nypost.com