Well before Madonna and Guy Ritchie split, the writing was on the wall – literally.
The feuding couple decorated their Central Park West apartment with a wacky marriage contract two years ago after they visited a counselor, The Sun newspaper in Britain reported yesterday.
It’s not clear who wrote the contract – but it made Ritchie feel like climbing the wall on which it was posted, his friends told the paper.
Among Guy’s contractual commitments was a promise to “enrich” his wife’s “emotional and spiritual well-being.”
In case he couldn’t figure out on his own how to do this, all he had to do was take another look at the wall poster – where he could read about his obligation to set aside time to read his wife kabbalah texts.
Kabbalah is a mystical offshoot of Judaism that has attracted numerous celebrities.
But it all wasn’t all about religion.
Under some of the other rules, Guy, 40, and Madonna, 50, had to devote time to their “sexual expressiveness.”
But that came with a warning – they couldn’t “use sex as a stick to beat one another.”
Living under those rules made Guy “feel bound up like a kipper,” a family friend told The Sun.
In another weird development, it was reported that Madonna wanted to fill the pool at their estate in Wiltshire, in southwest England, with special blessed kabbalah water. But thanks to Guy, the idea went down the drain, according to Britain’s Daily Mirror.
“Guy partly blames kabbalah for the deterioration of their marriage,” a source close to the unhappy couple told the paper. “So the last thing he wants is an Olympic pool-sized reminder of the religion.”
The source added, “There would also have been water fountains dotted around, again filled with kabbalah water.”
The source said that since the split, they’ve agreed to let Guy keep the country home, so “one of the first things he’s insisted on is scrapping the ridiculous pool plans.”
According to kabbalah’s Web site, the special water is channeled through certain “kabbalistic blessings and meditations,” leaving it “infused with sharing consciousness.”
“Kabbalah water manifests water’s primordial capacity to heal and protect.”
Another British report said the divorce could be settled as early as next week, because their daughter Lourdes begged, “Please don’t be mean to each other.”