In the new memoir “JFK Jr., George, & Me,” Matt Berman the co-founder of John F. Kennedy Jr.’s political pop-culture magazine George, reveals how Kennedy’s voice guides him from beyond the grave whenever he needs advice.
“What would John do? What would John say?” he asks himself in difficult situations. Here are six life lessons that other mere mortals can learn from the savvy, almost other-worldly John-John as outlined in Berman’s book.
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1. Be mysterious
Spencer A. Burnett/NY Post Don’t always talk to fill in awkward silences — Berman had a habit of running his mouth when he was nervous. “Don’t feel like you have to say something, Matt,” Kennedy told him.
“Be mysterious: let people wonder.” Berman tried the tactic with limited success when he coordinated a shoot with the formidable Barbra Streisand posing as seamstress Betsy Ross for the cover of George.
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2. Don’t be pushy
Time Life Pictures/Getty Images Berman describes how Kennedy taught him to appear calm and cool during negotiations even when there was a lot to lose.
When a star was hesitant about appearing on the cover of George or wasn’t interested in Berman’s unconventional suggestions for the shoot, Kennedy would say: “Matt, call them back and tell them we understand, and ‘Maybe next time.’ ”
When he reminded Kennedy that they were behind schedule and didn’t have a backup plan for the cover, his boss assured him: “We’ll just hold onto our balls and see if they come around.” Berman says, “His rule was: ‘If you want an answer right now, the answer is “No.” If you wait, we’ll see.’ ”
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3. Talk with your mouth full
AP JFK Jr. quickly made ordinary folk relax and forget his privileged upbringing by acting like “one of the people.” That meant casual table manners — chatting with his cheeks stuffed with food and stealing morsels from other people’s plates.
“I think Jackie taught him to be unspoiled, masculine and real,” writes Berman. “He could high-five a stranger on the subway, eat with his hands and slurp from your can of soda in a way that dispelled the image of a Little Lord Fauntleroy.”
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4. Talk to the shyest person in the room
Vivian Ronay/Getty Images “It was hard to be intimidated by John,” writes Berman. “He had this informality about him that put people at ease. At a party, he’d find the shyest person in the room, go up to them and ask them something easy to answer. He would find a way to relate to whomever was standing in front of him.”
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5. Show your appreciation
Henry McGee/Globe Photos Inc. Instead of just Christmas bonuses, Kennedy and his wife, Carolyn Bessette, picked out personalized presents for every staff member at George. Recalls Berman: “We gathered in his [Kennedy’s] office as he gave a juicing machine to Jen, the vegetarian, [and] a Dunhill lighter to the English editor who smoked like a chimney.”
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6. Have your own sense of style
AP When many of Jackie O’s belongings were being auctioned, Berman asked John-John, “What kind of stuff are you keeping? Don’t you want some cool painting for your loft like a Warhol or something?” Kennedy shook his head. “I don’t know,” he said. “A lot of it’s not really my taste. I kind of want to buy my own things.”