Sex & Relationships

Men’s tales from the online dating trenches

As anyone who has swiped through Tinder knows, people have all sorts of intentions when it comes to online dating.

In the first episode of Bravo’s new reality series “Online Dating Rituals of the American Male,” we’re introduced to two such extremes. The show, which premieres March 9, follows two men each week in their quest to find a match online.

Alex Stein, an entrepreneur, is a 27-year-old who is just looking for a hookup. Marcus Pierce, 37, a celebrity fitness trainer and creative director, wants to find his wife. “It was all about learning how the guys were looking at women, how they look at their profile pages,” says Shari Levine, Bravo’s senior vice president of current production and original programming. “People put a lot of thought into their profiles. It’s a real inside look into how this group of guys judge people.”

The good news is, Levine says she learned that men are pretty honest in their own profiles about their relationship interests.

Here are the differences between a guy looking for lust and a man looking for love online:

The hookup hunter: Alex

Alex is no amateur: Since graduating from Louisiana State University in 2010, the Lothario has hooked up with more than 100 women he’s met online.

“When I first moved to LA, I was trying to go in the bar scene, trying to meet girls. It was OK — got a little luck,” Alex explains. “Then a buddy of mine told me to try online dating. Within the first two weeks, I was going on dates like crazy. I was turning down dates!”

Part of his luck lies in spreading the wealth among various sites: He’s tried OKCupid, ChristianMingle, JDate, BlackPeopleMeet, Match and Tinder. “There isn’t a Web site I haven’t perused,” Alex says.

Still, this playboy warns fellow hookup artists that not all sites are created equal.

“Say you’re out at a bar; you can go on Tinder and meet up with a girl you find on there right then. That’s the real hookup one,” Alex reveals. “The other one made for hooking up is OKCupid, because that’s free. And that one’s better than PlentyOfFish, which is a little more seedy — it kind of reminds me of Craigslist.”

Pay sites such as Match and eHarmony, he says, attract women looking for serious relationships.

The key for looking for the same level of commitment (or lack thereof) is to check out a potential mate’s answers to a site’s questionnaire.

“Some of these survey questions are like, ‘Would you be willing to have sex on the first date? And so you can tell from my answer that yes, I’m willing to have sex on the first date, and so I’ll be matched with girls looking for the same thing,” Alex says. “That’s pretty candid — but that’s what online dating is: a way to find someone looking for the same thing you are.”

The romantic: Marcus

Marcus’ parents met in kindergarten and are still married — and when it comes to mating, he wants the same: “It’s always been about finding The One,” he says.

Marcus has tried eHarmony, Match and OKCupid in his quest for love and says what a woman’s profile and photos convey is more important than the site they’re on.

“I want to see something where they’ve written about their family, about love, about things that I know are important to me,” he says. “And on the pictures — I’m a guy who believes you can see how pure someone is and how much they enjoy their friends and their life in the eyes. Are they smiling? Are they happy? Or do they just have a bunch of selfies in front of their computer?”

Marcus, who was married once before, has been looking for love for about seven years, but he still holds out hope he’ll find The One.

“Online dating works for me, because I don’t have time to get out to bars and lounges,” Marcus says. “I believe you can find love anywhere if you’re looking for it.”