Sex & Relationships

Ask Ashley: love work in progress

I have a severe crush on a girl I work with. We’ve gone out a few times, but I’m pretty positive she has no clue how I feel. I want to express my feelings, but I’m concerned she won’t feel the same way and if she does, might be leery of hooking up because we work together. What do I do?
— Anonymous

Well, you’re never going to know unless you put it out there. As long as she’s not your boss (and you’re not hers), I don’t see a problem with divulging your feelings.

In fact, you should try something creative to let her know how you feel. Since you’re friendly and have gone out before, you’re probably aware of some of her favorites: flowers, lunch spots, snacks, etc. I think you should send her things spread out over the course of a week. Sort of like a secret admirer. Start on Monday by leaving her an arrangement of her favorite flowers. In the card, write something like. “You know me and I know you, but I’d like to get to know you more.” Let her be curious for a day, then on Wednesday, leave her a little something from her favorite lunch spot or a coffee place she goes to for a midday pick-me-up. With this one, get a little more personal in the card, and also give her some clues as to who you are. Finally, on Friday, leave a simple Post-It on her computer when she’s not looking that says something like, “Have I driven you crazy enough? Let’s meet so you finally know who I am (unless you’ve already figured it out!)” Tell her you’ll be waiting on a certain day and time at a certain place with a single red rose. (I know this sounds cheesy, but I’m telling you, women go crazy for this stuff!)

The whole ordeal will prove you put a lot of thought into developing something with her. Unless she’s going out of town — or just skeptical, in which case you’ll probably find out through office chatter — she’ll be there.

At the end of the day, what’s the worst that could happen? She doesn’t show or she’s not interested? I think you could have a fair shot. Let me know how it goes!

In July 2004, I was diagnosed with type 2 diabetes. I always keep my sugar under control with exercise and diet, and I don’t drink. Mr. Woody is fine, too. Problem is, I’ve been in a few relationships since, and every time I bring up the issue, I get an awful reaction. One of my girlfriends just blatantly walked away when I told her.

A couple months ago, I hit it off with a 25-year-old divorced woman. She said she was drawn to me because “I’m a happy person.” How do I tell her about my condition? If I get another horrific reaction, I swear I’ll just crawl back into my town house and never come out again! — Matt, 36, Ohio

Type 2 Diabetes is such a common form of diabetes that I don’t understand why you’re getting such bad reactions from women. My only guess is that they’re not properly educated about the (often controllable) disease, which isn’t really their fault. That said, all you can do is keep your head high (and your sugar levels low) so that it no longer negatively affects you or your social life.

As far as this new girl, I don’t see the point in telling her — yet. If everything is under control health-wise and it hasn’t affected the time you’ve spent together so far, leave it at that. Treat this like any new relationship: As you continue to go out and experience things with each other, you’ll both start to reveal personal attributes along the way. This is just one of yours. Maybe it’ll be the subject of a conversation that you bring up when you’re more comfortable, or maybe it’ll come up casually on the fly, if you need to adjust your levels or choose one dessert over another. If you play it off like it’s not a huge inconvenience or anything to worry about, she’ll feel the same.

Have a question? E-mail AshleyDupre@nypost.com and follow her on Twitter at @ashleydupre.