Ralph Kramden would be spinning in his fictional grave.
While trendy A-list alleys, such as Williamsburg’s Brooklyn Bowl and Greenwich Village’s Bowlmor, continue to lure hipsters with fancy eats, blaring bands and overpriced drinks in posh lounges, one of the city’s last remaining old-school, affordable bowling haunts is facing its final frame.
Owners of the classic Maple Lanes in Borough Park, Brooklyn — where cheap beer, cheesy decor and greasy burgers are on the menu every night — want to raze the joint and replace it with a synagogue and brick town houses holding up to 182 apartments.
John LaSpina, co-owner of what is the borough’s biggest bowling alley, declined to comment, but his group’s zoning-change application claims the project would provide “needed housing” for “densely populated” Borough Park and a synagogue with community-event space for a growing Jewish population.
The Karl Fischer-designed project for the 60th Street site — which begins its city review tonight at a public hearing before Community Board 12 — has regulars atthe 52-year-old mainstay feeling as if they’ve just rolled a gutter ball.
“Maple Lanes is an institution — it’s a cornerstone of Brooklyn,” said Mark Goldberg, 50, while bowling there last week with his daughter, Jaclynn, 15. “I don’t want to believe that someday it might not be here.”
Others said such a loss would devastate many local bowling leagues and high schools, as the nearest alleys are at least three miles away and are too small to accommodate everyone.
“A lot of schools will be affected,” said Ronnie Maiman, coach of the girls’ bowling team at Brooklyn Studio HS.
“These kids love bowling, and if Maple Lanes is gone, it will be very difficult for them to pursue their hobby.”
The loss of Maple Lanes would make it especially difficult for the many bowlers on a budget. The alley charges $4.50 per game — a bargain next to the $100 some might shell out for a night at high-end lanes.
“Back in the day, people actually cared about bowling,” said Jeremy Kirschner, 25, while hanging out last week at Bowlmor. “Now, all we want to do is drink, dance, party and hook up. Bowling is more of an afterthought.”
To stay “competitive” with the trend toward upscale joints, pro bowler Lou Seda completely renovated the former Gil Hodges Lanes in Mill Basin after purchasing it three years ago.
Now called “Strike 10 Lanes,” the business has picked up and attracts both longtime budget-conscious customers and free-spending bowlers seeking private “boutique lanes,” he said.
“The boutique lanes are for folks who want to spent a lot of money, wine and dine some clients, or perhaps show off by ordering a steak while they sit on a fancy leather couch,” Seda said. “And then maybe they’ll bowl.”
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Maple Lanes
(1570 60th Street, Borough Park, Brooklyn)
Background: Open since 1960, this old-school operation hasn’t changed much since your parents and grandparents started bowling. Brooklyn’s biggest bowling alley features 48 lanes and is popular with bowling leagues, but its owners are seeking city approval to replace it with luxury townhouses and a synagogue.
Pricing: $4.50 per game ($3.50 for league bowlers); $4.25 shoe rentals.
Food/Drink: Includes burgers ($5.50), mozzarella sticks ($6.95) and fried mac & cheese ($4.50).
Brooklyn Bowl
(61 Wythe Ave, Williamsburg, Brooklyn)
Background: Bowling is secondary at this hipster hotspot, which opened in 2009 at renovated 19th Century-era former Hecla Iron Works building. Offers 16 bowling lanes but better known for its live-music shows and quality eats provided by foodie favorite Blue Ribbon restaurant.
Pricing: $40-$50 an hour per lane (maximum of 8); $4.95 shoe rental; $5 nighttime door cover.
Food/Drink: Includes Cajun catfish ($18), buttermilk pancakes with friend chicken ($18-$22), house-made granola ($11.50), and long list of Brooklyn-made booze.
Bowlmor
(110 University Place, East Village, Manhattan)
Background: Open since 1938, this Village landmark has attracted such guests as the Rolling Stones and Richard Nixon. Now a NYU-student hangout, it features 42 glow-in-the-dark lanes with full-service bars, an indoor mini-golf course, bocce area, and nightclub room.
Pricing: $11.95-$12.95 per game; $6.50 shoe rental.
Food/Drink: Includes calamari ($10.95), shrimp skewers ($12.95), cheeseburger sliders ($9.95) and a wide variety of cocktails, wines and champagnes.
Strike 10 Lanes
(6161 Strickland Ave., Mill Basin, Brooklyn)
Background: Formerly Gil Hodges Lanes. Opened in 1961 and once boasted 64 lanes until ex-owner eliminated half of them to pave way for gym. The new owner, pro-bowler Lou Seda, is overseeing a complete renovation that already includes adding new lanes, flat-screen TVs, leather couches and other amenities to attract both loyal patrons and a new upscale clientele.
Pricing: $4.50-$6 per game; $4.25 shoe rental.
Food/Drink: Includes Buffalo wings and fries (10.75), burger and fries ($10.75) and Pina Coladas ($9).