With the holidays fast approaching — and with them the challenge of squeezing friends and family around an awkward arrangement of tables — the potential for disaster is as palpable as the anticipation of pumpkin pie and presents. Besides overcooking the turkey and keeping the mother-in-law on the right side of tipsy, for families with pets, preserving harmony between excitable dogs, petrified cats and rambunctious children only adds to the pressure.
Whether they’re expecting a new baby — or just expecting someone else’s kids to storm their apartment this holiday season — there are plenty of ways adults can and should teach child and beast to coexist peacefully.
When it comes to cats, who are typically more independent and less social than their canine counterparts, a house full of sugar-rushing toddlers and 9-year-olds with lightsabers can spell danger if not properly managed.
“Kids can be so sudden in their movements and so noisy with all the screaming, it can be frightening for cats,” says Carol Powley, a volunteer at a no-kill shelter. “If I were expecting a lot of children over, I would either make a point of introducing them to the cat and teaching them how he likes to be treated, or better yet, just keep them separated.”
Dr. Arnold Plotnick of Manhattan Cat Specialists, a veterinary hospital just for cats, agrees. His holiday fact sheet warns: “If throwing a party at home, make sure your cat has a safe, quiet room all alone.”
Cats and kids can be a tricky mix even when they’re immediate family. Katie Workum, 39, a choreographer living in Fort Greene, Brooklyn, notes that her cat Thistle and daughter Willa, 3, are friends now that the tot has that learned that yanking the cat’s tail can mean getting scratched. When other kids come over, though, they don’t know better. “She has swiped at a couple of them,” Workum says. “It gets bad because they all want to grab the cat.”
Teaching kids to respect animals and understand their boundaries is absolutely vital if you want to avoid incident, says Renee Payne, a certified dog trainer and owner of Walk This Way Canine Behavior Therapy. That way, no matter how relaxed Spot or Fluffy may seem, a child can recognize when he’s had enough. “A dog will let you know if he’s uncomfortable,” she says. “Running away, showing teeth, a look or growling always comes first,”
Payne holds regular seminars where children learn how to safely interact with animals — to stroke, not grab, Fido and to never disturb a dog when it is sleeping, eating or chewing a bone.
The education goes both ways. To teach their chocolate-Lab puppy to get along with kids, Brooklynites Mary-Jane and Eyan Mitchell, 39 and 42, began ”stress-testing” Lucca as soon as they learned they were expecting a baby. “We stuck our hands in his food, and took it away, pulled his ears and tail while he ate and slept,” she explains, adding that they also showered him with affection. Sasha, now 2, and Lucca, 3, have become inseparable, she says.
Emily Rothschild, 34, an industrial designer who also lives in Brooklyn, makes sure to tire out her 77-pound mutt, Mae, before family get togethers. “If we know all the kids are coming over we try to get her a lot of exercise first,” Rothschild says. “She gets very excited and sometimes doesn’t know her own size and strength.”
Ultimately, around the holidays, it’s best to remember that pets, like all of us, have their limits. “Eight hours in a noisy room with food everywhere and children is far too much stimulation and often leads to misbehavior,” says Payne. “The best thing to do is to is let them say their hellos and then put them in their crate or in another room with a toy.”