SO LONG: Chuck Bass (Ed Westwick, bottom, with Leighton Meester) will be missed. (
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Farewell, Upper East Siders. After six soapy seasons, “Gossip Girl” is coming to a close tonight.
There’s no one we’ll miss more than Chuck Bass (Ed Westwick).
Chuck’s time on the series about impossibly wealthy New York young’uns was initially spent drinking, doing drugs, making lewd remarks, and bedding anything with legs and an accent.
He wore bawdy yet stylish outfits (usually purple) and made sarcastic, pervy remarks in low, growling tones.
He was the quintessential tortured soul, constantly brooding, acting bored, scheming, searching for his maybe-dead-maybe-alive mother, and butting heads with his domineering father.
And no one will even name-drop himself like Chuck Bass.
Example: “I’m Chuck Bass.” As in, “We don’t need tickets. I’m Chuck Bass.”
Sometimes he varied it a little: “I’m Chuck Bass. Even Europeans must know what that means.”
When “Gossip Girl” started, it appeared that producers were setting up Nate Archibald (Chace Crawford) to be their leading man, pitting him in a love triangle with Serena van der Woodsen (Blake Lively) and Blair Waldorf (Leighton Meester).
Then they wised up, realizing that devious, suave, Chuck was far more intriguing as an antihero than pretty-but-dull Nate.
Chuck’s stunts have involved making passes at his stepsister Serena, ordering Brooklynite Dan Humphrey to take off his shoes and get out of a limo, sending fake posts to the Gossip Girl Web site with subjects like, “Muffy’s Muff Gets Stuffed,” and going on a grief-propelled bender full of hookers and opioid delights in Thailand.
Chuck’s perspective as an obscenely entitled young man was both insightful and terrifying. He once shared with Serena, “For people like us, a college degree is just an accessory. Like a Malawi baby or a poodle.”
It wasn’t until he fell for Blair that he really hit his stride. He tortured her by threatening to reveal their clandestine encounters to her then-boyfriend, Nate. He later “sold” her to his uncle in order to keep his hotel.
After Blair tried to manipulate him and tossed a drink on his crotch, he quipped blandly, “You’re desperate, and I’m bored. And you ruined my pants.”
She called him a “Basshole.”
No really, these two are perfect for one another.
If the series finale promos are to be believed, Chuck will finally marry Blair in Central Park, just before the cops haul him off for the murder of his father, Bart Bass (Robert John Burke).
As he once said, “I’m not Chuck Bass without you.”
We’re just disappointed he opted for a white tux over purple.