Sports

Lakers torch Stoudemire’s ‘D’

Amar’e Stoudemire is proba bly pretty happy with his point production (20.5 avg.) against the Lakers in the Suns’ two decisive setbacks. But not as happy, I suspect, as Pau Gasol and Lamar Odom (44-for-66 from the field) are at having him monitor their movements.

It’s sinful how easily Stoudemire is being used and abused. He never battles for position before the catch on the block, frequently gets caught in no-man’s land on rotations and fell fast asleep on one pick-and-roll in Game 2 that Pau finished at the rim unmolested.

Then again, it might even be worse when Stoudemire pretends he’s defending. He reaches for the sky on shots he can’t possibly block (Kobe’s floater in Game 1), goaltends long after there might be any doubt (Game 2) and often leaves his man below for no reason, resulting in a put-back.

On the plus side, Stoudemire’s prospecting for rebounds has led to a total of nine boards. “Imagine,” said one head coach, “if he used his size and quickness to get around people boxing him out the way he zips along the baseline or darts into the lane for layups or dunks!”

Let’s be clear about this: Neither the Suns nor any other finesse team — past, present or future — can hope to contain Gasol, who has amassed an effortless 50 points. Arguably Europe’s all-time best player (Dirk Nowitzki . . . Arvydas Sabonis?) is simply too skilled, too smart and too slippery.

If allowed to do what he does best, leisurely, Gasol can make any shot he wants.

That’s why the Celtics should be able to stand up to the Lakers. Boston is a team of manhandlers that relishes the art of dishing out punishment.

Is Pau still too soft? That will be the critical Finals question.

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During the season the Nets had a one-in-two chance to win a game . . . theoretically.

Tuesday night, they had a one-in-four chance to win a lottery . . . mathematically.

Lost ’em both.

They should have hired Russian judges.

Meanwhile, the Wizards are the first team in NBA history to go from “the right to remain silent” to “the right to select first.”

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Apparently feeling the pressure of being chief (of a weak, mistake-prone crew) for his first-ever third-round playoff game, Joe DeRosa flipped the ball to a heckling Orlando fan at the start of Game 2 intermission. A player would have been automatically ejected for tossing anything — ball, headband, towel — into the stands, so the league had no other choice but to suspend him for one game without pay.

Not sure how that works since referees get paid by the round (roughly 21G for this one) no matter how many games they do. Might the announcement just be window dressing?

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So, I’m wondering, if Tom Thibodeau is to be credited with the Celtics’ defensive strategy, how does he not get a job?

Even more on point, if Thibodeau’s contribution is so vital, why is Danny Ainge pushing him so hard for other jobs when Doc Rivers imaginably could leave after this season?

Should that happen, would Ainge hand the job to Thibodeau? Or would he bring in his buddy Kevin McHale, who has a relationship with Kevin Garnett?

Contrary to everything that’s out there, the Hawks are not looking to low-ball their new coach. If that were true, why would Avery Johnson (coming off a $4.5 million per Mavericks contract) agree to be interviewed? Why go through the process if he knows Atlanta won’t go any higher than the $2 million bogus number being circulated?

Maybe Dwane Casey and other assistants/start-up coaches (Dean Demopoulos /Mark Jackson) can’t command more than $2 million, but there’s probably another million or more on tap for someone like Johnson, who has been to the Finals.

According to fountains of misinformation, Casey is favored to fill vacancies with the Clippers and Hawks before even interviewing for either. L.A. continues to wait for Larry Brown to pick up one and leave the other behind (Bobcats or Paper Clips) now that it appears Doug Collins and the 76ers have reached an agreement.

If, in fact, William Wesley tried (is trying) to package LeBron James and John Calipari, as numerous journalists submitted, to the Bulls, Clippers and Nets, and officials representing those organizations actually discussed it, that would be outright tampering . . . subject to immense fines, loss of draft picks and suspensions.

On that note, George McInnis advocates the Knicks ignore Manu Ginobili‘s recent three-year Spurs extension and sign him anyway this summer.

“If the mere activation of Brian Scalabrine has done this to 0-2 Orlando, imagine if he plays?” column contributor Brian McGunigle notes.

Don’t be too hard on Vince Carter for missing those crucial free throws. You try focusing when your water breaks.

I slouch corrected. Shaq ain’t done. BP offered him a contract as a containment dome.

peter.vecsey@nypost.com