At the risk of turning this column into the Green Goblin Gazette, let’s have an other go at “Spider- Man, Please Sign My Cast.”
I’ve got my foot on its neck, and I’m having too much fun to take it off.
The latest: Safety inspectors from Actors’ Equity are headed over to the Foxwoods Theater today for yet another examination of the newfangled — and bone-cracking — flying techniques that have sent two actors to the emergency room, one with broken wrists, the other with broken feet.
Production sources say Kevin Aubin, the kid who broke his wrists, is being well-looked-after by an aide, who dresses, feeds and bathes him. The aide is being paid by the production, which means the cost of “Spider-Man” is now $65 million — plus home care.
Since The Post broke, so to speak, the news of Kevin’s injuries the other week, Equity has been all over this danger zone of a musical.
The union is in daily phone contact with the cast to make sure nobody else is on the injured list. Equity will also have someone at the theater during rehearsals whenever the projectiles — sorry, I mean the actors — are being catapulted through the air.
Union officials will also be at the first weekend of previews, starting Nov. 28.
Equity insists this is par for the course, but theater insiders say the scrutiny on “Spider-Man” is more intense.
The New York State Department of Labor, meanwhile, is awaiting a call from the producers inviting them back for further inspections.
“We’ve made it clear that we stand at the ready to go back in whenever they call us,” says department spokesman Leo Rosales.
“When we were there two weeks ago, they only showed us seven aerial maneuvers — seven out of 35. They are not legally allowed to perform any maneuvers we have not signed off on.”
The powers that be at “Spider-Man” are gnashing their teeth that they’re under the inspectors’ microscope. They fear some of the stunts will be curtailed, thereby clipping the wings of director Julie “PantaLOON” Taymor.
“She’s all about pushing the envelope,” says a source. “And you can’t push it too far with a bunch of safety inspectors on your back.”
Another source laughs and says: “Leave her alone! She’s an artist!”
Taymor, in a recent interview with 411.com, pouted about my spirited reporting on the show.
“This is a time of terrible unemployment,” she said. “We have around 200 people involved in this, being paid every week. Do we really want to see them lose their jobs?”
To which I can only respond: “Do we really want to see them lose their lives?”
Hurtling through the air isn’t the only danger confronting the actors in “Spider-Man.”
I hear Daniel Ezralow‘s strenuous choreography has the potential to put a few of them in traction.
Dance auditions were held the other week, and after 20 minutes, at least four performers headed out the door, theater sources say.
“It’s all very modern stuff, and they were asking them to do moves that, if something goes wrong, it could be the end of your career,” one person says. “They were like, ‘No thank you.’ ”
“Spider Man, Please Sign My Cast” has a new opening night: Jan. 11, 2011.
Taymor thinks that’s the perfect date.
“We love 1-11-11,” she says.
It’s a catchy number, Julie, but if I were you, I’d keep 911 handy.