RICH Trish and poor Henry (Katie Cassidy, Christopher Gorham) are getting married and everyone else is getting killed. Tough luck, that, but perhaps the couple shouldn’t have chosen a destination wedding at a destination known for a serial killer who once took out six people including one wedding guest’s mother.
That wedding site is, of course, “Harper’s Island,” an island off Seattle where all the exceptionally-thin wedding guests either summered or lived at one point or another. Before the wedding party even takes off on the chartered boat to the island, one cousin has been tied under the boat and will be chopped to pieces by the propeller as soon as they take off.
But no one seems to notice the huge amount of blood as they power off into the sunset for a week at Harper’s Island. One by one, the guests and others are murdered but, oddly, for the first three episodes, no one seems to notice that they are missing.
There are also booby traps all over the island, presumably set by hunters to catch large animals who are supposed to fall into 10-foot-deep holes (OK, really suspend disbelief here) or get strung up by their legs. Well, you know, of course, that only people fall and rise in these traps.
There are at least two murders per episode, so you’d think sooner or later the guest list would have thinned enough for someone to notice, but they keep partying on while the others are being tortured and killed.
The show, which will kill itself off after 13 weeks, plays out like a murder mystery that viewers will try to solve. It’s written like a dopey daytime soap, it basically makes no sense, but it sure is silly good fun — especially with lines like, “The last thing I need is a deer head in my bathroom.” How true!
“Harper’s Island” Tonight at 10 on CBS