The worst — or nearly the worst — show on TV, “Pretty Wicked Moms,” gets even worse tonight when the tedious moms attempt to be interesting. Noooo!
They do this by going wild as in “Girls, er, Moms Gone Wild” in Miami.
Thing is, these idiots aren’t wild — they are just giant bores, as in being totally uninteresting and in behaving like caged bovine.
Since I avoided reviewing this show (how many married women in Atlanta can anyone take?) when it debuted, I thought I’d give it a shot now with tonight’s “special” girls trip episode. I was wrong.
Watching will steal an hour of your life which you will still regret on your death bed.
What we have here are a bunch of desperate-to-be-famous-for-no-reason women who try to be funny and naughty by wearing bikinis and drinking too much. Trust me: These moms could be naked and on crack and they’d still be boring. One of these women isn’t even a mom — unless you count her Shih-Tzu, which she wheels around in a pink stroller.
Tonight, they go to the Miami vacation house of Marci, a divorcee. Her Florida digs are not tacky like her Atlanta house, which looks like it was built by the Russian mob.
We watch the implant-enhanced dames pack, fly and arrive en masse while their husbands stay home and take their toddler daughters (and sons!) to the little girl beauty salon. Kill me first.
During their “wild” week away, the Wicked Moms drink too much and fake-laugh outrageously at each other’s comments because they think we’ll think they’re amusingly clever. Nah.
They aren’t even very catty with each other, and are constantly saying how nice they all are. Many “Woooos” ensue, but it all falls flat — which is more than you can say for the Wicked Moms, because falling flat with the implants on some of ’em would be a physical impossibility.
Why do they have a show?
Avoid void these “Moms”
like a wicked outbreak of the SARS virus.