AREN’T we forgetting someone?
It’s as obvious as the stench regularly emanating from the Jersey swamps that Dina Matos McGreevey was well aware her husband, the gay ex-Governor Jim, preferred hard bodies to her body.
In the midst of a divorce battle so vicious, so primal and so carnal, it makes Heather Mills’ epic struggle against Sir Paul McCartney look like a frisky Jell-O fight, news has exploded that Mr. and Ms. McG were not alone in the bedroom.
Or, alas, at that fine freeway dining establishment, TGI Friday’s, where the first item on the menu is – and I could not invent this in my feeble Queens-bred brain – TGI Friday’s Three-For-All.
According to former McGreevey driver Teddy Pedersen, the couple frequently enjoyed dinner a trois, before retiring to lick leftover spicy Buffalo wing sauce and chive-immersed sour cream from Pedersen’s body.
Lord knows what they did with the fried mozzarella sticks.
Dina all but acknowledged the frequent TGI Three-For-Alls when she testified in a divorce deposition.
But now, all of a sudden, Dina remembers she’s a mother. She denies ever doing the nasty with the fit, young stud for the governor’s benefit.
Meanwhile, Jim boy is more than happy to acknowledge he preferred his men the way he likes his chicken wings – hot and greasy.
I wish I did not have the barnyard image of middle-aged lust forever imprinted on my brain. But our incompetent northeastern governors seem intent on topping one another, or something equally unsavory.
Oh brother.
If I may get serious for a moment, I have an important question: They allow this couple to breed?
In these days when adults indulge their most tawdry, high-fat fantasies without fear of legal consequences, incurable disease, or disapproving columnists, I have to yawn. At least McGreevey’s escort was on the state payroll, not a paid escort a la New York’s one-time governor with so much love to give, Eliot Spitzer.
But I think we’re forgetting that the McGreeveys have a daughter, Jacqueline, now 6.
She is old enough to read. Old enough to change the channel on the television.
Old enough to become subject to cruel schoolyard taunts.
Old enough to be scarred for life.
The ultimate villain is Dina McGreevey. Were it not for her insatiable greed – she wants Jim McGreevey to pay from his meager pockets for a lifestyle equivalent to the one she enjoyed as New Jersey’s First Doormat – the McGreeveys would save a bundle in legal fees.
Plus, we’d all be able to live in ignorance of this revolting couple’s low-rent naked ways.
If the judge in the case has any sense, she’ll make an effort to remove the child from the clutches of this pair immediately. Child-protective services should take action.
Little Jacqueline is road kill in her parents’ blood battle against each other.
They don’t deserve her.
Every one of these adults deserves the other.