Bar etiquette expert Angus Winchester bases his advice on bad behavior he’s seen at lounges around the world. (
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When a group of people booked a private party at Macao Trading Company’s swanky downstairs lounge about a year and a half ago, the staff had no idea it’d be playing host to a swingers’ party.
“We didn’t know until people at the party started taking their clothes off,” recalls co-owner Dushan Zaric.
The good-natured bartenders toughed it out and served the party, but the waitresses got a reprieve: “You can imagine they were approached by these bald, middle-aged dudes,” says Zaric, a 15-year nightlife vet.
When the five-day Manhattan Cocktail Classic festival starts today, attendees will have plenty of opportunities to misbehave in a bar — but not if cocktail guru Philip Duff has anything to say about it.
The consultant, who splits his time between New York and Amsterdam — where he owns cocktail den Door 74 — is co-presenting tomorrow afternoon’s “How To Behave in a Bar” at the Astor Center.
The seminar, co-presented with Angus Winchester, aims to illuminate the world of bar etiquette, whether the goal is to impress a client or date or just ensure good treatment from the bartender.
“When I worked at my bar in Amsterdam, I was surprised by the behavior of off-duty bartenders from other bars, and even from my own off-duty staff,” Duff says. “I used to make jokes a couple years ago where I’d say in one or two years I’ll have to teach people how to be nice to each other!”
So what are some of New York bars’ worst stories? We solicited tales from bartenders at watering holes across the city — and some of them were downright weird.
* Triple Sadness: “We had a man come in who was really depressed,” recalls bartender Hila, who declined to give her last name. “He kept talking about wanting to kill himself, to the point where we had to call Bellevue to come and get him.”
Ironically, the 2008 incident occurred at the now-closed NoLIta bar Double Happiness.
* Forget me not: GoldBar owner Jayma Cardoso remembers when two families showed up without a dinner reservation at her Montauk restaurant, The Surf Lodge, on a busy Saturday a couple of years ago.
“I think one wife wasn’t happy about waiting [at the bar],” Cardoso says. “After visits to the hostess stand, she demanded that they leave. So they did, and I apologized and encouraged them to come back during the week, when it was quiet.”
The kicker? The parents forgot their kids.
“It took over an hour [for them] to realize what they did,” Cardoso says. “So our bar staff and I took turns playing with the kids, which was actually a lot of fun.”
* Behind bars: Current WXOU Radio Bar bartender Paul Amodeo had his share of crazy customers when he worked at the now-shuttered Saloon on the Upper West Side. But one customer stands out.
“A number of years ago . . . this guy comes in and says, ‘Buy me a drink. I’ve been away,’ ” he recalls. “I thought he looked familiar, so I say, ‘Welcome back. Where have you been?’ He says, ‘Away. How about a couple tequilas?’ So I pour him a drink and ask again, ‘Where have you been?’ I’m wondering if he has any vacation pictures. He says, ‘I’ve been away’ . . . and then shows me his release papers from Rikers.”
The Manhattan Cocktail Classic starts today and runs through Tuesday; tickets for some events are still available at manhattancocktailclassic.com.
A few tips
Want to get in good with the bar staff? Follow these simple rules of thumb:
* “Please don’t snap your fingers at us, and we won’t snap our fingers at you. We’re here to provide service, but we’re still human.” — Tara Wright, ‘21’
* “If you’re planning to drink a lot, don’t close your tab after one drink. It slows the bartender down considerably.” — Dushan Zaric, co-owner of Employees Only and Macao Trading Company
* “If it’s busy and you are with a large group of people and you see the bartenders are very busy, be considerate. Get the orders from everyone and present them at once.” — Zaric
* “It’s customary to tip 20 percent. I always tell people the easiest way to figure it is to double the first two numbers [of a three-figure bill]. Fifteen percent isn’t much these days.” — Eugene Brennan, co-owner, Park Avenue Tavern