Talk about getting stuck in traffic!
A man trying to get around a bottleneck in San Francisco drove his Porsche sports car into an empty lane — without trying to figure out why it was empty.
It turns out the lane had just been repaved — and the cement hadn’t dried.
A team of workers had to quickly dig him out — before the concrete set, trapping the $120,000 vehicle for the foreseeable future.
***
Before this kid tries to get high again, he should sign up for a course in elementary botany.
A 15-year-old Holly Hill, Fla., boy grabbed a tomato plant through an open kitchen window of a home.
Resident Angela Cartwright couldn’t figure out why, until he gloated out loud, “I have one of your pot plants.’’
“I chased him and yelled, ‘You stupid little brat. It’s a tomato plant,’ ’’ she said.
He was busted after Cartwright spotted him on a school bus.
***
Spark Sloan of Sarnia, Ontario, got some good news in the mail: a letter from Capital One saying he could be eligible for up to $30,000 credit, noting, “We’re not offering our low . . . rate to just anyone.’’
Only two problems: Spark is a dog. And he’s been dead for 10 years.
Spark’s owner, Kelly Sloan, said, “With the economy the way it is, I can understand they’re becoming a little more lenient . . . passing out credit cards.’’
***
A pregnant Scottish woman is hungry for news.
Ann Curran, 35, said her favorite food is copies of the Dundee Evening Telegraph, which she explained uses the “only newsprint with the proper flavor.’’
***
A British radio station was broadcasting a prerecorded program when it suddenly went live.
The station said an “unauthorized access’’ to the studio allowed the audience to listen to five minutes of passionate lovemaking.