Fashion & Beauty

Smell like dweeb spirit

The $220-million superhero epic “The Avengers” can dazzle your eyes with special effects. It can tickle your ears with dialogue from Robert Downey Jr. But there’s one vexing question it can’t answer, no matter how big its budget: What does the Hulk smell like?

As it turns out, yuzu, sandalwood and a bit of cedar. We would have guessed rage, torn cotton and White Castle, but to each his own.

A new line of Avengers colognes from fragrance company Jads International allows regular mortals to smell like the six stars of the movie, out today. Resistance is futile, ladies.

Captain America’s scent is called Patriot, Iron Man’s is called Mark VII (after his armor), Thor gets one called Worthy and Hulk’s got Smash. There are also scents for Black Widow and villain Loki.

These bottles join the shelves with other outside-the-box scents that are catering to a demo woefully under-served by the sex- and beauty-driven fragrance industry: nerds. Forget arty images — of scantily clad models diving into a pool — selling mystique and romance. These eau de toilettes are all about attracting a mate who’s got “Star Wars” on laserdisc.

“It’s more of a niche trend,” says Victoria Frolova, editor at perfume blog Bois de Jasmin. “There’s always a group of people who don’t want to smell like everyone else.”

So what will wearing a new scent based on “Spider-Man” comics say about you? Or how about a “Star Trek”-inspired fragrance called “Shirtless Kirk?” Or another based on “Harry Potter”? Or another from online forum CrowdGather that’s aimed at people who spend lots of time on the Internet? Or still another called, cryptically, “Elf Sweat”?

“We think things are fun and there wasn’t enough humor out there and enough quirky things and things with science, quarks and lesser-known historical figures,” says Ariel Mathews, co-founder of ZOMG Smells, a Seattle-based online store that sells geeky scents such as The Large Hadron Collider Produces a Strangelet, which celebrates the massive subatomic particle smasher in Switzerland.

These perfume makers are challenged tying a particular smell to an abstract concept or a character.

“I wish I could say this is easy,” says Andrew Levine, owner of Maryland-based Jads International. “It takes around four to five times to really mix it to the right place where it should be.”

Levine works closely with Marvel to develop ideas based on the Avengers’ attributes, then he creates various formulas.

Iron Man, for example, is a wealthy businessman and a womanizer, so Levine wanted his cologne to smell like “success.”

The Hulk’s cologne is, of course, more earthy, with notes of musk and citrus.

ZOMG’s Giant Robot Birthday Party “smells like cake and motor oil and a little automotive paint,” says co-founder Holly Zehnder. “It’s popular with girls in the engineering field.”

Their tribute to the Large Hadron Collider is meant to evoke strangeness, so it contains hints of lettuce, mint and ambergris, a secretion found in whale guts, which is great if you hope to date a porpoise.

Levine admits some customers may be buying his Avengers smells as collectibles.

A bottle of Avengers cologne will set you back $30 (also available online at jadsinternational.com), while a bottle from ZOMG goes for $14 (zomgsmellsshop.com).

It’s a small price to pay for individuality, but on a first date, you may just wanna say you’re wearing Calvin Klein.

reed.tucker@nypost.com