Ok, So here’s today’s topic in Advanced Sporting Arithmetic 101:
When does a dry spell officially become a drought?
The Rangers used to be our gold standard. Even someone who didn’t know a forecheck from a tuning fork used to be vaguely aware of the year 1940, because it held some kind of mystical hold over the city. 1940: For years, that was also known, by those who reduce sentences to acronyms for sport, as TLYTRWTSC: The Last Year the Rangers Won the Stanley Cup.
Officially, the wait lasted 54 years, before the Rangers won the ’94 Cup and forced Islanders fans to think of some other way to taunt them. Which begs the question: If the Rangers don’t win the Cup this year, or next year, or the next, at one point can people start chanting “1994”? It doesn’t have all that good a ring to it. And, besides, the Islanders next year engage — and this is almost impossible to believe — in what would be their 30th year without a Cup.
Can someone say, “1983!”
Is there a point of delineation? Is it 20 years? Thirty? No other team of ours has approached the 54-year emptiness of the Rangers (well, unless you count the ’55 Dodgers, but, as you may have heard — ssssshh, don’t tell Fred Wilpon — they don’t play here anymore), but some of them are coming up hard along the outside. Where do they sit on the question? Let’s take a look:
Jets, 43 years — Yes, this is officially a drought, a desert, a barren landscape where hope has gone to die. This is the Sahara of New York sports because since Namath’s index-finger salute, not only has every other area team won a championship, every one has also at least gone to one other championship round. There isn’t enough Gatorade in Manhattan to quench this thirst.
Knicks, 39 years — And if you look around, this has the chance to be the granddaddy of them all soon. Seriously, if you root for the Jets and the Knicks, which team do you think will break through first? Exactly.
Nets, 36 years — Sure, they were ABA titles. But I will risk the scorn of all New England and declare, defiantly: those ’74 and ’76 Nets would have beaten, straight up, the ’74 and ’76 Celtics teams that won the NBA titles. Prove me wrong.
Islanders, 29 years — As we mentioned earlier, the Isles won a Cup in just their eighth year of existence, and it felt like that title run went on forever. Now all that’s left is that whistling chant of scorn at the Garden. God this is depressing. Next …
Mets, 26 years — I think the Mets offer the best example of when a tough stretch becomes something more: at year 25. Only one World Series appearance since ’86, just four playoff appearances since. Getting. Very. Thirsty.
Rangers, 18 years — That guy who wove the sign “Now I Can Die In Peace?” I wonder if he died in peace. I hope not. The dying part, I mean.
Devils, nine years — The only regret of a Devils fan? Their three titles the last 17 years easily could have been — probably should have been — double that. At least.
Yankees, four years — OK, insert your own four-years-feels-like-40 joke for the Yankees here.
Giants, three months — You know what’s funny? It’s been so good to be a Giants fan the past few years — really for most of the past 25 years — that it’s hard for some to remember that this used to be every bit as torturous a fan experience as the Rangers were, or the Jets are. Eighteen straight playoff-free runs?
There’s hope for everyone yet.
Whack Back at Vac
Kenny Gibe: Please stop heaping praise on Carmelo Anthony. He’s the Terrell Owens of the NBA — a cancer to his team who puts up incredible numbers for himself but in the end loses. Ask yourself this: Would you rather have a vintage Bill Bradley on your team, or the current Anthony? Sure, Carmelo could run circles around Bradley; Dollar Bill would just win.
Vac: I wrote this in March and believe it even more now: Melo is the basketball A-Rod, a lightning rod with equal numbers of supporters and detractors who desperately needs to win a few playoff series one of these years for his own good.
@ejt63: Eduardo Nunez is a butcher in the field. An error a game means he gives the opponent a run a game. He’s a future DH.
@MikeVacc: That pre-supposes that he’s not actually a current DH.
Donna Rubin: My husband Mark and I, long-time Rangers season-ticket holders, were at Game 5 and it was just incredible. Besides hugging and high-fiving each other, you find yourself doing to the same with people you don’t know and you don’t even care. It’s like those two guys in the Buffalo Wild Wings commercial. That’s one of the things that’s so amazing about sports and especially playoff hockey.
Vac: I write this Friday afternoon, without knowing how it all went down last night, but I will say this unequivocally: You don’t root for teams in the press box. But I have found myself rooting for Rangers fans all playoffs long.
Garry Wilbur: So let me get this straight: Jeremy Lin has a few great weeks and already there’s a book out on “Linsanity?”
Vac: Well, it once took Robert Caro 10 years to write about 10 years of LBJ’s life, so really a couple of weeks is about right to capture Linsanity, no?
Vac’s Whacks
Carl Beane, the Fenway Park PA man, died this week at the criminally young age of 59. Like Bob Sheppard did for years at Yankee Stadium, Beane always took seriously his role of being a host at baseball games, not a carnival barker — an especially salient point on a night when the Knicks played in Miami where the Heat’s insufferable PA man, an amped-up clown named Michael Baiamonte, channels the worst elements of all modern PA blowhards.
* Speaking of South Beach, my new TV addiction: “Magic City” on Starz. Outstanding writing, acting, scenery. Just make sure the kids are in bed before you fire it up because it makes “The Soranos” seem like “The Little Rascals.”
* I’m so tired of baseball attendance turning into a daily referendum. As Yogi Berra once said: “If the fans don’t want to come to the ballpark, nobody’s gonna stop them.” And that refers to both of Yogi’s old teams, because it isn’t like the Yankees turned away business when the first-place Rays were in town. The only ones who should care about how full a building is are the team accountants. It used to be press-release-worthy news when a team draw 1 million fans. I miss those days.