The first two days of the NCAA tournament are arguably the best 48 hours of the sports year. But it is also featured during the day, creating problems for the working world. If you haven’t thought ahead and asked your boss for the days off, and are freaking out about what to do, we have a solution for you.
Below are some ideas to get out of work without endangering your job.
Health: What boss would put his worker’s health in jeopardy? This is where friends come in, at least ones who sound like a doctor. Back issues work well and are prevalent in the work world; the flu has been done too much before. “The only remedy is laying on my couch.” With the television on! Another good excuse is a hernia operation — it takes a few days to recover from and who is going to check on you down there? Minor operations also work, such as an extracted tooth or needing a growth removed.
Children: There are so many options here, from schools trips to illnesses to the nanny going on vacation. Just make sure you either have kids or your superior knows about them in advance. If you don’t have kids, this lie will catch up to you — unless, of course, you have a friend with children and they are willing to go along with the gag when future complications arise. Be prepared to keep this lie going for a while.
Pets: Cats and dogs get sick all the time, need to get to the Veterinarian — what better time to do that than during the NCAA Tournament – and often times have to be closely monitored. If you’re boss is unsympathetic, he or she is a terrible boss to begin with, so this could be a sign to look for a new job.
Jury duty: This can be risky, unless you have a trusting boss, then it can’t fail. Of course, make sure you don’t have actual jury duty in the near future, because then you will need an excuse for actual jury duty. But it is against the law not to serve and is punishable by a large fine. Most bosses won’t think twice.
Wedding: Everyone has an out-of-town wedding sometime. I have a few this summer. What better time than now, and you’re in the wedding party, so you’re flying out early Thursday for the rehearsal dinner. It can’t miss. The only downside: It’s not wedding season. This is best for gullible bosses.
Honesty: Depending on your boss, this may work also, though it is risky. “Look, I will be worthless in the office. I’ll be checking my phone every 25 seconds. I will get nothing done. May as well save the company money.” It may sound far-fetched, but it’s better than getting caught in a lie.
zbraziller@nypost.com