One of the more depressing moments in a man’s life comes with the realization that he’s no longer young enough to be cougar bait.
That was one of the random thoughts prompted by “Cougar the Musical,” a kind of public-service announcement for theatergoers of a certain age. As Yogi Berra once said, “It ain’t over till it’s over.”
In this case, it’s not about baseball but the female libido.
Based on playwright/composer Donna Moore’s former cabaret act — same title, only with a comma — the show depicts the romantic adventures of three women pursuing men young enough to be their sons.
Which, in one embarrassing situation involving Craigslist, turns out to be the case.
Their disparate types are designed to appeal to multiple demographics. Mary-Marie (Babs Winn) is a 50-something, trash-talking Southern gal who owns a cougar bar she calls a “den of antiquity.” Clarity (Brenda Braxton, a former Velma Kelly from “Chicago”) is an African-American financial analyst working on her thesis for a graduate degree in female studies. And Lily (Catherine Porter) is an emotionally fragile divorcée who makes her living playing Dorothy from “The Wizard of Oz” at kiddie birthday parties.
The message, loud and clear, is about female sexual empowerment, preferably with younger men with six-packs and no visible nose hair. And from the opening number, “On the Prowl,” in which the women literally purr, to “Julio”— a passionate ode to a vibrator — there’s nothing subtle about it.
The one-liners are many and predictable.
“Where have you been the last 10 years of my life?” asks Lily of the young man in the “Twilight” T-shirt giving her a back rub.
“High school,” he replies.
Danny Bernardy plays the various men (and, briefly, a female salon owner), including one so naive, a statutory rape charge doesn’t seem out of the question. His principal role is as Buck, a hunky actor/bartender with whom Lily starts an affair.
In its eagerness to please, “Cougar” veers from raucously broad comedy to sensitive drama. That said, the perky, eclectic tunes, accompanied by a pianist and drummer, hit the right notes; the performers inhabit their roles with lusty gusto, and the bare-bones staging is polished, thanks to its director/choreographer, the Tony-nominated Lynne-Taylor Corbett (“Swing!”).
To loosen things up, ticket holders at Wednesday night shows are offered a free “Cougartini,” a pomegranate juice and vodka combo which, we’re told, “has the antioxidants to keep you feeling young and the vodka to help you forget that you’re not.”
Of course, you’ve got to be 21 and older to have one — but for the target audience of “Cougar the Musical,” that shouldn’t be a problem.