Hondo, who finished last week with an 8-7 record — 8-6 for his NFL picks, 0-1 with his presidential pick — projects the following in Week 10:
Bengwads over Giants: Mr. Aitch liked the Giants but outsourced this selection to Paul “The Octopus” Schwartz, who — incredibly — has nailed the score in two of the last three Giants games.
Jets over Seahawks: Rex proclaimed this week that the Jets aren’t even close to being playoff contenders. If that’s the case maybe Rex shouldn’t have been such a “player’s coach” and instead made his 3-5 troops work during their bye week.
Rex Ryan was named the most overrated coach in the NFL by the Sporting News — the sporting world’s most under-read publication. According to BarkingMut of SoBe, Rex said anyone who voted for him can kiss his feet.
Meanwhile, in another survey, Sanchez and Tebow were named the league’s most overrated players. After Gang Green’s special team breakdowns against the Fish, the great Mike Westhoff has to be in the running for most overrated assistant.
Patriots over Bills: While campaigning for Obama last week, Bill Clinton took a shot at Romney for not telling the truth, saying: “When I was a kid and I got caught with my hand in the cookie jar, I kind of got red, shrugged my shoulders and took my hand out of the cookie jar.” Then when Bill got caught with his “hand in the cookie jar” as an adult, he got red, wagged his finger and said, “I, did not have sex, with that woman, Miss Lewinsky …”
Buccaneers over Chargers: According to a study for the Williams Institute (whatever that is), teens with lesbian mothers are more successful in school and happier in life. The boys are especially happy because their moms let them hit from the red tees.
Broncos over Panthers: Emailer Siciliano, aka the Bronx Bomber, claims that Colorado’s legalization of pot has Ricky Williams mulling a comeback with the Broncos.
Titans over Dolphins: Referee Tony Corrente let out a stream of obscenities during last week’s Fish-Colts game, which prompted an immediate apology from announcer Kevin Harlan. That would have been a good time for Harlan to offer a mea culpa for polluting the airwaves with more excess verbiage per second than any broadcaster in the history of TV/radio.
Ravens over Raiders: It’s good to see all is right in the left-leaning world. Chris Matthews has a steady stream of thrills running up and down his leg (not only because of Obama, but Sandy, too), and Brian Williams is ready to make another pilgrimage to the White House so he again can pay tribute by bowing to Barack.
Albert Collins, the late great blues man (“I ain’t drunk, I’m just drinkin’ ” — a Diane Sawyer favorite) was known as the Master of the Telecaster. Obama’s impassioned victory speech proved again he is the undisputed Master of the Teleprompter.
ABC and Sawyer denied her erratic election night performance had anything to do with an overindulgence of adult beverages, so what could it have been? Hondo expects her to take a page from the Kerry Kennedy/Tom Brokaw book and blame it on Ambien — accidentally ingested, of course.
Saints over Falcons: After Obama won the election Tuesday night many of his delirious supporters celebrated by running through the streets in Midtown, partying like it was 2008, and that was mostly members of the media.
Mark Bassely Youssef, the man behind the offensive video Obama desperately wanted to blame for Benghazi, received a one-year jail sentence for probation violations. Now that he has been brought to justice, maybe Barack can turn his attention to hunting down the Libyan terrorists.
Memo to ABC, NBC, MSNBC, CNN: With Barack all tucked in at the White House for another four years, it’s probably safe to start probing the Benghazi scandal.
Lions over Vikings: BarkingMut points out that Obama was helped enormously by two Sandys — the fluke storm and the storm over Fluke.
Speaking of Sandy, Chris Matthews, who was “so glad we had that storm last week,” was a little disappointed in Wednesday’s nor’easter. Apparently, the lack of devastation didn’t provide any photo-ops for his favorite pandering pols.
Cowboys over Eagles: SuperNanny Bloomberg proved totally tone deaf with his initial decision not to cancel the Marathon. Add tone deafness to his other ailments — the meddlesome mayor also is an obsessively compulsive control freak with an acute Napoleon Complex — and it’s easy to see why he makes so many poor decisions.
Rams over 49ers: One good thing about Obama winning is that it means four more years of first-rate, foot-in-mouth, embarrassing entertainment from the ol’ gaffe machine himself, Joe “Did Your Son Always Have B-lls The Size Of Cue B-lls” Biden.
Bears over Texans: Romney supporter K-Dog of Md. says he is willing to give Obama some slack right now because he inherited such a mess from the last four years.
Steelers over Chiefs: It looks like the Repubs are serious about welcoming more Latinos to the party. Word is that now when you call party headquarters, the answering machine responds: Hola, amigos y amigas! Que pasa! Para espanola, oprima numero uno; para Ingles, oprima numero dos.
BEST BETS: Patriots, Bucs, Bears.
LAST NIGHT: Colts (W).