Some owners in my building have painted their balcony railings white after being informed by building management that this was not allowed. I spoke up at a recent meeting, saying we all need to follow the house rules — to no avail. I’m now fearful that I’ll wake up one morning and find a neighbor standing by my window, looking in threateningly! (Our balconies are attached.) — Marc L., Upper East Side
Sadly, the 17th-century proverb “Good fences make good neighbors” doesn’t take into account the aesthetic nuances required above 59th Street, where uniformity is cherished above all, and the maxim might rather have been: “Matchy-matchy makes neighbors happy.” You’ve done the right thing in speaking up. Now, however, you need to step out of the conversation and let your board do the dirty work. Noncompliance with the house rules should be a fineable offense, with the penalty compounding with each passing month. P.S. Your board would be wise to take action sooner rather than later. That is, unless you’re OK with candy-striped balusters — which may well be next.
When my downstairs neighbor’s Internet service got knocked out during Hurricane Sandy, I gave him my Wi-Fi password so he could get online. My network’s been super-slow ever since and I suspect he’s still piggybacking on my signal. How do I politely pull the proverbial plug? —Kristina D., Morningside Heights
Unless you have reason to believe his signal is still out, you’ve more than done your good deed. In other words, the time has come for you to change your password. May I suggest the following: “no_such_thing_as_a_free_lunch”?
Am I rude for emptying my neighbors’ completed wash when I’m waiting to do my own? Jason R. —Turtle Bay
Given that some people think nothing of starting a few loads of laundry and then heading out for a leisurely afternoon of shopping, the fact that you’re giving 16A’s unmentionables the bum’s rush is perfectly understandable.
If it’s wet laundry you’re moving, place it in one distinct mound on a folding table, making certain you empty the washer fully and that you don’t drop anything. Even better — and if this is an ongoing issue — petition your building for a few baskets to be placed around the room for containment of neglected laundry. As a last resort, transfer the clothes to the top of the washer you just emptied, ensuring that the surface is free of dirt and dust. Whatever you do, don’t mix the load with anyone else’s soggy wardrobe.
If you’re removing wash from the dryer, carry it gingerly so as not to crunch or wrinkle it. After doing so, some neighbors even go so far as to fold it. This gesture, though well-intentioned, can be a little creepy. I prefer to fold my own cycling shorts, if you don’t mind, and I suspect most people feel the same way.
Our next column will be devoted to holiday tipping.
Got a question? Drop me a line at testingthemarketnyc@gmail.com or tweet me @MisterManners.