No luck needed for Tide to roll over punchless Irish

Brian Kelly (AP)

MIAMI — Put it this way: America could have used Lindsey Nelson on the call last night, the old voice of the Mets who was also once the narrator of those Sunday-morning condensed showings of Notre Dame football games, so we could mystically have “moved ahead to further action later in the game.”

Yes. It was that bad.

Put it another way: When Notre Dame finally scored a touchdown late in the third quarter of the BCS Championship game last night, mercifully allowing the Fighting Irish’s segment of the 80,120 people inside Sun Life Stadium to finally have something to cheer about, it ended this remarkable two-year streak for the Alabama Crimson Tide: 108 minutes and seven seconds in BCS Championship games, zero points allowed. Alabama 56, LSU/Notre Dame 0.

Yes. It was that bad, too. So maybe the lesson in the aftermath of Alabama’s 42-14 win is to be careful what you wish for, to be careful about being seduced by what looks on paper (and according to history books) to be a game for the ages and instead turned into a game for the sages, as in those with the wisdom to have seen Alabama – 9 1/2 and thought: Thank you for the tardy Christmas present.

“We’ve closed the gap from where we were when we took this program over,” Notre Dame coach Brian Kelly said when it was over. “We have one more step to go.”

One more step for the Irish, one more ring for the Tide, which now occupies a universe unto itself in this sport. Put it this way: As good as Alabama was in the 1960s and the 1970s, when it seemed you saw a houndstooth hat on your television more than Walter Cronkite, they are every bit as powerful now. And maybe more so.

Bear Bryant did win six national titles, but it took him 25 seasons to collect them. Nick Saban is already halfway to the Bear and he has needed only six years to get there. Saban isn’t easy to like. He isn’t easy to root for. He isn’t cuddly. Isn’t pithy.

He probably doesn’t care.

Would you?

So Notre Dame staggers back home and the Irish alumni get to mournfully wait for a fitting encore for 1988, have to try to wrap their arms around a beautiful ride that ended in a terrible taste of reality.

This was a splendid year for the Irish, and if only Oregon or Kansas State hadn’t gagged away their pristine seasons late, if Georgia could have finished Alabama off in the SEC title game, then the Tide wouldn’t have even had the opportunity to turn this next-to-last BCS Championship game into the unwatchable mess it became. But the Ducks quacked away their chance, and the Wildcats coughed up a hairball, and the Dawgs … well you saw what they did.

So for the second straight year, the rest of America made the most critical mistake you can make in college football now:

Let the Tide sneak in the side door. Gave Nick Saban a month to torture everyone.

Starting with Notre Dame, starting with Kelly, who not only was content to bring an absurd defensive game plan to the biggest stage of his career — rushing as few as two and three men against a statuesque quarterback — but also opened the game with a regrettable offensive plan too, four straight passes, when it was clear the only chance the Irish had to stay in the game was to bleed the clock, own the ball, shorten the game.

In truth, it probably wouldn’t have mattered. LSU couldn’t knock Alabama out for good in November last year, Texas A&M couldn’t bury them at sea this November, and Saban is nothing if not proficient at cashing his mulligans.

And — surprise — he really does have a sense of humor

“Whether I look it or not,” Saban said, “I’m happy as hell.”

Notre Dame doesn’t look to be a one-year flash, and you can see Kelly bringing the Irish back to the Last Game soon enough.

Just not this time, not this year, not this game against this team. Against Alabama, you kept wanting to say what Rudy’s buddy D-Bob says when he sees him on the field for the first time:

“They’re so little!”