Lifestyle

Dear Santa, can you bring good cheer to ‘Scrooge’ bosses?

Dear Santa,

Here’s my Christmas wish list. Please note there are no ties on the list. No offense, but you’ve got better taste in toys. Like the advice I give my readers, stick with what you do best, and go with it. All I want is for you to spread your cheer to make some of my wishes come true:

Please help the Self-Important Guy get over himself. You come from a cold climate, Santa, so here’s the cold, hard truth: It’s everyone’s job to add value and be worth employing. But no matter how valuable they are, or think they are, if they stopped showing up for work tomorrow, the business would survive. What if some of your elves started acting like big shots (no pun intended)? If you banished them, Christmas would still go on.

Please help the Staffer Who Loves to Make Excuses — the one whose bus always breaks down, whose printer always jams, whose computer never saves his presentation. Help them understand all we hear is, “The dog ate my homework.” Remember that big storm that threatened to cancel Christmas? That didn’t stop you from figuring out how Rudolph could help you deliver on your responsibilities

And let’s not forget the Woe Is Me Worker. I know, Santa, we all have problems, some people have truly difficult personal lives, and we have to be empathetic. But with some people — you know the ones: the one whose cat always has to go to the vet; the one whose friend always betrays them; the one who hates his job, his boss and even the nice lady who comes once a week to water the plants — even Rudolph’s nose can’t shine bright enough for you to find your way through their dark cloud.

And finally, for the bosses who seem to be auditioning to play Scrooge — just between us, Santa, did they act like this as children, too? Did you always have to give them coal in their stockings? What if we scare the Dickens out of them with those three ghosts? If they just acquired an ounce of your good cheer, the workplace would be a better place. Happy holidays, everyone.