Entertainment

Rubbin’ on the edge

Dot Stein has had her hands all over the naked bodies of the biggest rock stars in the world. The encounters go down backstage — before, after and even during concerts for thousands of screaming fans.

The Rolling Stones, Paul McCartney, Lady Gaga, Jay-Z, Steven Tyler, the Ramones, Mariah Carey, the Grateful Dead: She’s had intimate encounters with all of them.

The 44-year-old Hoboken resident, known as “Dr. Dot” — a nickname bestowed on her by Frank Zappa — has been working out the music world’s kinks for the past three decades as rock ’n’ roll’s most in-demand masseuse.

“I outlast most of the bands — not all, but lots,” Stein says with a laugh. “They’re naked and vulnerable on the massage table, so they’re usually nice to me. You better be nice to people on the way up because you’re going to meet the same motherf – – kers on the way down!”

Stein’s husky voice and salty patois are evidence of a long run beside some of the hardest-partying stars on the planet. She’s had a front-row seat to A-listers’ adventures, heartbreaks and tantrums — and isn’t afraid to name names when it comes to troublemakers on her table.

“There are some pop stars who feel they’re so famous that they don’t have to pay,” she confides to The Post. “Lady Gaga personally is lovely, but her camp are very difficult — it’s like pulling teeth to get paid. And Britney Spears: she’s a sweetheart, but her managers wouldn’t accept a £50 minimum for a backstage massage in London — good luck with that.”

Stein has also found herself in sticky wickets with Mariah Carey (for daring to eat one of the diva’s chocolate truffles), Mick Jagger (for fliers posted backstage before Sir Mick’s show) and Steven Tyler (for naming her signature lip massage the Mick Jagger Method).

“I was massaging Steven two years ago and I did his face and he was saying, ‘My lips are way bigger than [Jagger’s] — you’re going to call this the Steven Tyler Method from now on!’ ” she recalls. “He’s the funniest person ever to massage. He was jumping off the table the whole time, lighting these incense rocks he got in Saudi Arabia with a tiny blowtorch.”

Just another day in the life of the queen of rock-star rubdowns.

As a young woman, the native New Englander used her preternatural massage skills to wriggle backstage access to the likes of the Dead, the Ramones, Def Leppard and even the Stones.

“My mom and dad were hippies, so I’ve been massaging since I was 5 years old, walking on my parents’ backs and [the backs of] all their hippie friends,” she explains. “My parents couldn’t keep up with my taste for live shows, so I’d skip school and offer to give [bands] the best massage in the world for free, to get into the shows — that always worked.”

It took a personal scolding from the Stones’ Charlie Watts to finally nudge Stein into charging a fee for her handiwork.

“He was like, ‘Doll, no one’s going to take you seriously unless you take money for your massage,’” she remembers. “He gave me 200 Canadian dollars and employed me on three Stones’ tours — it was amazing.”

With that auspicious launch, Stein would go on to work out the tensions of everyone from Gene Simmons to Josh Groban (her clients also include NFL players, Paris Hilton, Bruce Willis, Juliette Lewis and comedians Colin Quinn and Jim Norton). Living in Germany from 1989 to 2002 helped solidify her then-fledgling business, which now has 679 global “Dot Bot” massage employees on its books. “Being an American in Berlin, I had the market cornered for every rock band that toured Europe,” she says. “Everyone who came — Lenny Kravitz, Oasis, Eminem — I gave the best massages and I gave them all tours of Berlin.”

Stein’s famous clients share more than their muscle tensions as they relax in her hands, often spilling about their love lives. “They call me late at night if they’re going through a breakup or a divorce,” she confides. “Sheryl Crow, to put it bluntly, had just gotten dumped by Eric Clapton — she was in a bad way, so she opened up and I gave her my two cents,” Stein remembers. “And then Courtney Love opened up to me, after yelling ‘massage my t – – s!’ — but obviously my advice didn’t help.

“Robert Plant was once juggling a very young 19-year-old girlfriend that I helped with, and Bruce Willis — I massaged him during his breakup with Demi Moore, and was giving him advice.”

Stein says romantic counseling goes with the intimate territory. And while she keeps things strictly professional (“I try to stay out of the way and be seen and not heard,”), fiascoes are inevitable.

She recalls one mischievous request from Kid Rock to show up at Bungalow 8 and give him a massage at 2 a.m. Stein heeded his call, showing up at the elite club with hair in a messy ponytail and a bottle of oil strapped on her hip.

“I arrive and there’s this bevy of Pam Anderson look-alikes around, and they all stared at me and were like, ‘Meeeeow,’ ” she laughs. “I was like, ‘Bitch, please, I’m not going to steal Kid Rock from you.’ ”

As for her spat with Mick Jagger?

“He was mad because there were too many Dr. Dot fliers hanging backstage for his show in Berlin — and it wasn’t even my fault, the wardrobe lady put them up,” she explains. “He was like, ‘This is not a f – – king Dr. Dot concert, it’s a Rolling Stones concert!’

“So we got into an argument, but they appreciate that, because they like to be kept in check sometimes.”

One songstress who had no interest in checking her ego with Stein was Mariah Carey. The masseuse showed up at “Mimi’s” hotel at the appointed time. And waited. And waited. After 90 minutes, Carey’s manager encouraged Stein to help herself to food or drink, so she noshed on some milk-chocolate truffles. “Mariah came in, said hi, looked down at the truffles and was like, ‘John, Dot ate my last four chocolate truffles! You need to go get more,’  ” Stein remembers. “I turned white and wanted to jump out the window.

“So the poor guy was having new chocolates delivered, but none of them were the right kind. She kept saying, ‘I want the kind that Dot ate!’

“Oh, and she was watching ‘Mean Girls’ while I was massaging her. There was a whole s – – tload of movies to choose from, but her manager rolled his eyes at me when she wasn’t looking and was like, ‘We watch that movie every effing night.’  ”

But the snobbiest client to ever slide across her massage table? Vin Diesel. “I didn’t even know who he was when I got called to massage him at the Hyatt in Berlin,” she says. “I said, ‘I heard you’re from New York,’ and he goes, ‘Baby, I am New York.’ And then he wrote an autograph to me that said, ‘Drive safely.’ WTF? I mean, where is he now?”

Stein insists many of her clients with tough-guy personas — like Eminem, Simon Cowell and Jay-Z — are teddy bears in real life.

“Eminem is one of the coolest dudes ever, he’s not a d – – k,” she insists. “And Jay-Z, he’s not my type of music, but he was really nice and polite. I met him in Berlin and I was wearing a The Who shirt. He didn’t know who The Who was — I had to explain it to him!”

Her celeb habitués also have their own predilections on the massage table. “The Pizza Dough Method, where I knead, Simon Cowell loves that.” Not to mention the popular and aforementioned Mick Jagger lip massage, one of her most requested services.

“Sometimes it’s messy, like when Courtney Love wants a massage directly after her show,” Stein says, with a pointed pause. “It’s not always white sheets and a freaking massage atmosphere; it’s the guts and the glory.”

Stein’s guts have earned her the honor of rocking out onstage with Foreigner, having Sting give her a massage, seeing more than 3000 live shows for free, and dating Joey Ramone for three years.

That said, because she was only 15 to 18 when they dated, there was very little funny business. “We only smooched,” she says. When asked if anything ever happened with any of the other rockers, her response was a resounding “OMG. No!”

Stein’s currently content running her massage business from her home in New Jersey, which boasts its own hall of fame, filled with photos and memorabilia from her star clients, including an autograph from Steve Miller that reads, “Dot, you’re the smartest girl in rock ’n’ roll.”

But not to worry, Stein still has groupies — a 4-month-old baby boy and a decidedly nonrocker husband. “I love rock ’n’ roll, but you can’t trust a rock star,” she says. “I know what they do when they go on tour — that’s not the boyfriend of choice.”

Her career of choice, however, couldn’t be more satisfying.

“I believe I was put on this planet to take care of people and make them feel good,” she says.

“Massage is my contribution to rock ’n’ roll.”

Rock on, Dr. Dot.