Sex & Relationships

Ask Ashley: Look who’s not talking!

Few women make eye contact with me, even women I know in the office. It gives me the impression that they don’t want me to say hello or start a conversation. Do they want to be left alone?

Bill, 41, Long Island City

Well, it depends. What kind of look are you giving them? Is it a lick-your-lips, undress-them-with-your-eyes kind of look? Or is it just a sweet glance-over, where you lock eyes for a few seconds?

If you’re getting the impression that they want to be left alone, it’s probably the former, in which case they probably do want to be left alone. (And really, who wouldn’t with that stare down? Quit it!)

But usually, when eye contact is exchanged and the eyes are locked for more than a few seconds, there’s a sexual/flirtatious interest on both ends. So you need to see what kind of vibe you’re getting from them — and giving out. (On the other hand, they could just be in a daze. Sometimes when I’m walking it seems like I’m looking into someone’s eyes, but really it’s me in a crazy daydream thinking about all the things I have to do. Simple as that.)

Either way, the next time a woman makes eye contact with you, take note of how her glance makes you feel and take it a step further by smiling. If she smiles back in a cute, flirtatious, come-hither kind of way, approach her and spark up a conversation.

Use this scenerio as the basis for your next approach, keeping in mind that not all girls you make eye contact with will be interested in reciprocating. But eventually, there will be at least one who doesn’t want to be left alone.

After you’ve been seriously dating someone you met online for a while, how do you address taking your profiles down? Or don’t you?

Mickey, 46, Long Island

Well, if you’ve established that you’re exclusive, then I’d think it’s more than appropriate to have this conversation.

But which online outlet did you meet on? Was it a dating site or a social networking site like Facebook or MySpace? If it was an online dating site, there’s no need for either of your profiles to be up any longer. But if you met on Facebook or MySpace, that’s a different story. You want to trust your partner to leave her profile up, but it’s hard if you used it to meet her in the first place. It comes down to being secure with your relationship.

I would let her know that you want to see your relationship grow, and taking down both of your profiles is just one more step in that direction. Maybe you can sign on and take it off together, even if it’s as simple as changing that status from “single” to “in a relationship.”

I have a very strong fetish for feet, but I’m scared to tell my girlfriend. I’ve hinted to her in the past that she has nice feet, but that’s as far as I’ve gone. How do I go about telling her how I really feel?

Mitch, Brooklyn

Is it more rubbing and kissing or is it on an intense sexual level? Whatever it is will be new to her, so I’d work your way into this gradually. Start with: “So I’ve never talked to you about this before because I was scared to lose you, but I think your feet are amazing. . .and yes, I have a foot fetish.” (Maybe if you make light of it, she won’t be as terrified.) Follow that with: “I’ve done little things here and there, like give you a foot massage or kiss them from time to time, but there’s more to it. . .” Then, take it from there.

You owe it to yourself (and to her) to be honest, because that’s what relationships are about. It’s not like you’re cheating or don’t love her; it’s just something you enjoy and would like to share with your partner, which is totally acceptable.

If she can’t get over it and doesn’t want to participate, then you may have to choose between her — and her feet (or really, someone else’s). But have the conversation with your girlfriend first, and if it doesn’t work out, move onto someone who will appreciate all of you.

Have a question? E-mail AshleyDupre@nypost.com and follow her on Twitter at @ashleydupre.