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Lindsay Lohan arrives at court today. (Splash News)
LOS ANGELES — A snarky judge mocked Lindsay Lohan’s “cold,” after the troubled starlet tried to blow off court with a doctor’s note and copy of The Post.
Lohan arrived in LA late last night and made her pretrial hearing this morning before Judge Stephanie Sautner. Linz had wanted to skip court but was ordered to show up, so the “Mean Girl” could confirm her change of lawyers.
“Glad to see you’re feeling better,” Sautner quipped.
“Thank you,” Lohan sheepishly said.
Lohan Court DOcuments by New York Post
Lohan’s new lawyer, Manhattan-based Mark Heller, explained that Lohan had been diagnosed by her New York doctor with an “upper respiratory condition.”
Heller even attached the Jan. 11 front page of The Post, which carried a story about New York’s struggle with flu season.
Sautner clearly didn’t buy it and shot back: “Is that like a cold?”
“Yes, in New York City it’s the flu,” Heller responded.
But Sautner, a former NYPD Special Victims Unit detective, called out Heller on Linz’s near-sickout.
“I still have New Yorker in me, the flu, is the flu,” she said. “It’s a whole different illness.”
Despite the rocky morning with Sautner, Lohan won’t need to worry about her in March.
Saunter is retiring before the trial, so Lohan will face a new judge by then.
Heller still wanted to score points with the judge: “It is a great honor to appear before your honor and before a California state court. I believe that I heard that you were a former New York City detective?”
“That was in another life — flattery doesn’t get you anywhere in this court,” said a good-natured Sautner, who spent eight years on the job in New York before leaving to attend law school in 1981.
Heller, who came to court with a rabbit’s foot attached to his Louis Vuitton briefcase, said his client still has a bright future in Hollywood — and all she needs is a break.
“She’s beautiful, she’s talented and what she needs is some luck,” Heller said.
Lohan, 26, does not have to show up for her next pretrial hearing on March 1. But she will have to attend trial — set for March 18.
She’s facing misdemeanor charges for alleged reckless driving and lying to Santa Monica cops about a Pacific Coast Highway fender-bender.
But Linz’s bigger problem is her ongoing probation, stemming from a bust for jewelry theft. Even if Lohan’s not convicted of lying to cops, she could still be found in violation of probation and sent to jail.
“Now I don‘t know if you’re familiar with how things are done here. Miss Lohan could have her trial on the misdemeanor and be acquitted, and the judge could still find her in violation of probation because the level of proof in a probation violation is much lower,” Sautner said. “It’s preponderance of the evidence — do you understand that?”
“I do your honor,” Heller said.
Lohan’s mom Dina and Heller flanked the actress as she entered the courthouse near LAX.
The “Liz & Dick” star wore a dark-colored dress, just over the knee, and black and white Op-art Christian Louboutin platform stiletto heels.
The puffy-faced actress showed up sporting an odd half-tan, with her face and arms colored and legs a ghostly white.
Additional reporting by David K. Li and Kirstan Conley in New York