What goes around . . .
Now that we all know what many long suspected but few dare suggested — “Tiger Woods, World’s Greatest Golfer and Human Being” is only half true — we don’t yet know whether there will be layoffs at his dough factory.
As long as he remains the world’s best golfer, endorsement deals should remain available. It’s often explained to us that athletes who take big falls remain commercially viable because of the forgiving nature of the American public. That’s baloney.
It’s not that we’re forgiving, it’s that our standards keep getting lower.
Heck, Ray Lewis bargained an obstruction of justice plea in a 2000 double homicide, still unsolved. In 2004, he settled with the families of the murdered men. Although flagged and fined for countless episodes of excessive in-game brutality — acts followed by defiant statements of remorselessness — Lewis is still chosen by the NFL to star in its commercials, to sell its goods.
Years ago marketing strategists began to act on the notion that bad is good, but worse is even better. They still do. No good can come of that, and none has. The sellers aren’t forgiving, they’re shameless.
In Woods’ case, whatever commercial setbacks he may suffer, it should be recalled that in 1997 Fuzzy Zoeller had a few endorsement deals — one big one with K-Mart, but peanuts compared to Woods’ — when he took a colossal fall.
Zoeller was the Don Rickles of the PGA Tour. He poked fun at where people were from, how they spoke, what they wore, their weight, height and hat size. Walking down a fairway, he’d see TV crews and make wise cracks, few of which were funny. But that never mattered. The Fuzzy-equals-funny thing became obligatory, tired.
“That’s Fuzzy,” the TV guys would say with a forced chuckle, “always kidding, always having fun out there. That’s why everyone loves him!”
But then at the 1997 Masters, when Woods was 21, Zoeller made those infamous racial, if not racist, cracks about what Woods, as Masters champ, would serve at next year’s Masters champions dinner. Zoeller called Woods “impressive,” but referred to him “as that little boy,” adding, “You pat him on the back and say, ‘Congratulations, enjoy it,’ and tell him not to serve fried chicken. . . . or collared greens or whatever the hell they serve.”
Geez! That’s something out of a minstrel show or 1950 Alabama! What a racist, unfunny lout! Zoeller deserved what he quickly got. He lost his endorsements and his great-guy reputation; he was kaput, good riddance.
But only a few who chose to place the episode in full context — and at risk of being labeled a racist, too — would extend Zoeller a benefit of the doubt.
Many folks who were quick to condemn Zoeller were unaware that he was referencing a tradition in which the defending champ, and Zoeller was one, chose the menu for the following year’s Masters dinner. Then there was Zoeller’s celebrated comedic reputation for zinging players based on physical appearance. Combined, they made for a logical connection: Woods, black man, wins Masters. Black man will select stereotypical black food for Masters dinner. Get it? Plus, Zoeller must, as expected, make wisecracks into TV camera. The perfect storm.
Had Bernhard Langer won that Masters, would Zoeller have told that TV crew that Langer better not select sauerkraut? No doubt.
Fuzzy Zoeller was not so backwards, unworldly, detached or malicious that he would volunteer to speak racist hate to a TV crew. He’s the Don Rickles of golf, remember? Although this wasn’t the first stupid joke he’d spoken in public, look out below!
Suddenly America’s No. 1 ranked racist, Zoeller began to drown in an ocean of outrage, his endorsements cancelled, his name dirt.
His only shot was if Woods & Co. came to his rescue, if they applied context to explain and excuse Zoeller. King Tiger and all the king’s men could have called off the dogs; they could have at least broken Humpty’s great fall, reminded all that Fuzzy was just being Fuzzy.
But Woods & Co. didn’t say a word, not a peep. They let him drown. Hey, it wasn’t Tiger’s problem.
Many among the golf media felt that Zoeller paid too great a price for telling yet another bad joke — the kind the same media encouraged him to tell. They also were disturbed that Woods didn’t seem to care. The quality and quantity of mercy from Team Tiger were the same: zero.
And that surely didn’t rhyme with Woods’ already cast-in-stone image as a charity-driven man, the world’s greatest golfer and sportsman. But no one dared say that on the air or on the record. Whatever’s good for Tiger goes double for them!
And while the golf media knew better — knew from many episodes that the image of Woods wasn’t just unrealistic, it was bogus — they stayed the course.
You never know. By the time this thing blows over, Tiger Woods might ask Fuzzy Zoeller if he still has some contacts down at K-Mart.
MNF voices drop the ball, too:
Sometimes there’s nothing left to do except laugh.
Monday night, with 4 minutes left in the first quarter of Ravens-Packers, Ravens RB Ray Rice fumbled. On the next play, Packers RB Ryan Grant fumbled. Both RBs are noted non-fumblers (as well as local guys).
After the second fumble, ESPN analyst Jon Gruden was moved to remark that the night’s sub-freezing temperature has made it difficult for even the most reliable to hold on to the ball. Co-analyst Ron Jaworski agreed: “The ball gets a little hard, a little slippery.”
OK, fair enough.
With 12:00 left in the second quarter, Packers WR Greg Jennings couldn’t hold on to a ball thrown low and hard.
“Jennings has to make that catch,” said Gruden.
Jaworski agreed: “Ya gotta make that catch.”
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The St. John’s Red Storm played the Duke Blue Devils on Saturday on ESPN. Both teams, despite their nicknames, now have black uniforms. But only St. John’s wore them. Otherwise, when the Red Storm played the Blue Devils, both would have been wearing black. St. John’s played Georgia in the Garden on Wednesday, St. John’s had to wear its red and white uniforms because Georgia was wearing its black uniforms.
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Stop the music: I blew it here on Monday, suggesting that Fox didn’t switch to Saints-Skins, Sunday, to protect DirecTV’s out-of-market NFL package because DirecTV is owned by News Corp. (which also owns The Post). But I’d forgotten that News Corp. last year relinquished DirecTV in a stock swap with Liberty Media.
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In these desperate days when WFAN is accepting Wayne Root ads, can’t the station package and sell “The Mike Francesa Knows So Much More Than Everyone Else Lock of the Week”? Last week he big-timed a caller, insisting that Texas, a 15-point favorite, would annihilate — “crush” — Nebraska. UT needed a last-play field goal to win 13-12. He’s seldom correct, but never in doubt!