Sheryl Sandberg is hazardous to women.
The chief operating officer of Facebook, the universe’s top working mom, has reinvented herself as a latter-day guru to the fair sex — the rare lady who strives to give a leg up to the sisterhood.
But those who follow Sheryl’s lead are bound to be disappointed — bitter, broke, unemployed, and perpetually single.
To scads of fawning journalists and admirers, Sheryl, just Sheryl, is a pretty, but not too pretty and not too thin, 43-year-old working mom — just like us!
Sheryl (right) and her two kids live in a California mansion with a husband who does laundry. Her big career atop the giant social-media company made her a billionaire before menopause.
Did I mention that she’s filthy, stinking rich?
We are currently witnessing the Sheryl Moment. Her face, always tilted to a 15-degree angle to show she’s listening —or bored silly —is everywhere.
She appeared on “60 Minutes’’ last Sunday, annoying the bejeezus out of lesser females by declaring, in a soft voice, that if you’re not CEO of a Fortune 500 company yet, then it’s your own, damn fault.
The next day, her instant best seller came out, “Lean In: Women, Work and the Will to Lead’’ — which she called a “sort of feminist manifesto.’’ Mayor Bloomberg threw her a sort of book party.
Not unexpectedly, Sheryl was quickly savaged by jealous women who don’t own her pair of Harvard degrees, connections, Louboutins, or permission from their bosses to leave work every day at 5:30 for dinner with the kids.
These women also were not mentored by Sheryl’s economics professor, Larry Summers, who recruited her to the World Bank before age 30. Sheryl then left to become a Google exec.
The Daily Mail compared her unfavorably to ghastly Gwyneth Paltrow, who sells $1,500 enamel skull necklaces on her Web site, Goop.
New York Times columnist Maureen Dowd — a woman at the top of her field — savaged Sheryl in a remarkably sexist piece, “Pompom Girl for Feminism,’’ a phrase Dowd extracted from Sheryl herself.
“She has a grandiose plan to become the PowerPoint Pied Piper in Prada ankle boots reigniting the women’s revolution — Betty Friedan for the digital age,’’ she wrote.
I, for one, don’t hate Sheryl because she’s rich. I applaud her.
I resent Sheryl because she’s a phony.
For Sheryl is a traitor to the people she claims she wants to help — other women. That’s because she’s not honest about what it takes to rise to the top. Any waitress or department-store clerk will tell you that one can’t get ahead without stepping on a few toes.
Sheryl preaches a mantra that seems destined to get women fired, not promoted. She says that women who fail are not assertive, demanding or needy enough.
Gals, she complains, don’t bull their way into the corner office to ask for raises. At a time when a woman feels lucky just to have a job, here comes Sheryl, blaming the purported victim for being passive.
“I want every little girl who someone said, ‘You are bossy,’ to be told, ‘You have leadership skills,’ ” she said on “60 Minutes.’’
Of course, Sheryl seemed entirely un-bossy. In less than an hour, Sheryl Sandberg made it clear that the key to her success was not aggression, smarts or scheming. Instead, she’s taken being deferential and nonthreatening to an art form. Manipulation is her greatest weapon.
Dare I say she’s “ladylike”?
It is an uncomfortable truth to victim-happy feminists, like Sheryl. But younger women today out-earn guys. Sometimes by a lot.
But many women of childbearing age don’t want the headaches, long hours, and time away from family that comes with being a captain of industry.
Some women want to be moms.
Rumors abound that Sheryl plans to seek elective office. I hope she wins.
Then, maybe, she’ll stop saying how badly I’ve failed.
Life for not eating anyone
Sicko “cannibal cop’’ Gilberto Valle never kidnapped, cooked or ate a soul. Yet, the ex-NYPD officer, obsessed with ingesting female flesh, was convicted of conspiring to kidnap women, including his wife, to serve them up as unhappy meals. He also was nailed for illegally accessing a law-enforcement database to find addresses of ladies he craved to munch.
Now, Valle could be locked up for life for what amount to thought crimes. Amazing that in this libertine country, one may be imprisoned for his imagination.
Onlookers at Valle’s Manhattan federal trial learned more than we needed to know about his appetites. Valle swapped recipes with like-minded ghouls in sordid online chats. Meanwhile, every day, thousands of people worldwide visit Web sites that feed twisted fetishes, from cannibalism to rubber. And they’re legal.
Was Valle convicted of engaging in fantasy? Jurors, sickened by grotesque, doctored images of screaming women cooked on spits, punished Valle for his depraved hobby.
This guy deserves treatment, not prison.
Swallow the loss, Mike
Mayor Bloomberg’s noble efforts to fight obesity by banning large soft drinks from the city might have led to more fat.
Big sodas were to be forbidden, but not caloric fruit juices. Large milkshakes and coffee drinks were OK, if made from more than half milk (fattening) or ice cream (even more). No problem drinking all the alcohol you want — but watch the mixers!
Monday, a day before supersized sugary beverages were to go the way of the dinosaur, state Supreme Court Judge Milton Tingling wisely struck down plans to scrap sweetened drinks of more than 16 ounces from delis, restaurants, movie theaters and arenas, but not supermarkets or chain stores.
The nanny-in-chief, who is appealing the judge’s ruling, must stop the nonsense.
Fans wipe their feet on unwelcome matt
Matt Lauer should have quit while he was behind. In a disastrous bid to save his slimy reputation, Matt dubiously claimed to The Daily Beast that he wasn’t responsible for jettisoning beloved Ann Curry from the “Today’’ show.
Within hours, a Facebook page, “Fire Matt Lauer,’’ popped up, as well as an online petition demanding his head.
“What’s wrong with NBC’s management?’’ wrote reader M. Behan. “It’s Matt they should be getting rid of.’’
Time to go.
Pub-lic outrage
Snooty bartenders were outed by The Post for humiliating patrons, refusing to serve lowly light beer and cheap rum & Coke. This, after waiters roasted Post columnist Kyle Smith for complaining about the “hostage drama’’ unfolding in restaurants, as servers wait until one’s mouth is full to sneak up and demand, “How’s everything?’’
It’s enough to put New Yorkers back in their own kitchens.