The Astros came up a whisker short in Arlington last night, getting nipped in the ninth to expand Hondo’s IOUs to cavarrettas.
Today, Mr. Aitch will count on Wood to neutralize the Nats’ lumber — 20 units on the Small Bears. Tonight, he expects Quintana to roll against the one and only Jimmy Shields — 20 units in the Chisox.
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Rex Ryan assures one and all that the Jets will have a top-five defense this season. Along with their 32nd-ranked offense, that should guarantee a last-place finish in the AFC East. … Anthony “A-Wad” Weiner made a campaign ad in Spanish in which he vowed, if elected, to “restaurando disciplina en nuestras escuelas” (”restore discipline in our schools”). Most would be happy if the pervert vowed to restaurando disciplina a cierre de pantelones (restore discipline to his pants zipper).