US News

NOT-SO-SECRET SERVICE FOR VP AT OLYMPICS

Two Secret Service agents earned Olympic gold in doubles dimwittedness after they lost top-secret security plans for Vice President Dick Cheney.

The document – turned over to the Salt Lake Tribune by a concerned citizen – listed in detail precautions for Cheney at the Olympic Closing Ceremony on Sunday night.

The absent-minded agents left the document in a Salt Lake City store Sunday afternoon while they shopped for souvenirs.

“It had a pretty detailed description about what was going on,” said Clayton Greenhalgh, who owns Traps, the store where the document was left.

The lost log described seating arrangements at Rice-Eccles Stadium for Cheney, his wife and daughter, and other dignitaries.

The document also detailed areas of the stadium where Cheney would be present, including a “meet and mingle” session in the presidential box.

The exact number of agents assigned was outlined, along with their positioning.

The Secret Service would not comment on the matter.