Sports

Dumping Papa a bad — but typical — call by NFL Network

In recognition of finally getting something right, the NFL Network last week took a hammer and broke it.

In hiring Bob Papa three seasons ago to provide an immediate fix for a serious, self-inflicted wound — Papa replaced badly miscast and absurdly overpaid play-by-player Bryant Gumbel — NFLN made the best move in its short life.

Then 43, Papa could have been theirs for the next 20 years, occupying a position these NFL bosses would never again have to worry about, never again have to risk pushing the wrong button.

But that NFLN next named Matt Millen then Joe Theismann to become the telecasts’ analysts only provided proof that it likely hired Papa completely by serendipitous accident.

This offseason, after dumping blowhards Millen and Theismann — given past broadcasting disasters, neither should have been hired — Papa, a steady and highly credible pro, was rewarded with a kick to the groin: He was told he had to reaudition for his job; he had to do a taped game with Mike Mayock, NFLN’s new color analyst.

Papa should have known then and there that this was mere prelude to a shove, that NFLN needed some prefabricated excuse to dump him and “not working well with Mayock,” if needed, would make a handy one.

After all, if they had any intention of keeping Papa, NFLN would have assigned Mayock to audition with Papa, not vice-versa. ABC/ESPN’s Brad Nessler, it now seems clear, was NFLN’s new play-by-play guy all along.

Nessler is a Brent Musburger type, only far more sufferable.

But the privilege of breaking what wasn’t broken or already was fixed is one of the spoils of being a TV executive, executive, as in executioner.

Consider that Sean McDonough was pushed out at CBS, Marv Albert was booted from MSG Network, and Jerry Girard was jettisoned as Ch. 11’s sports anchor.

If there was something about Papa’s work that didn’t meet with NFLN’s approval, Papa should find that downright flattering, and a great source of comfort.

‘Citizen’ Artest still best at raising Cain

Dept. of You Can’t Make This Stuff Up: On April 27, an NBA press release carried word that the Lakers’ Ron Artest had won this year’s J. Walter Kennedy Award for exemplary citizenship.

A week later the NBA, in a press release, announced that Artest has been suspended for Game 3 of the Lakers-Mavericks series for gross misconduct.

Specifically, Artest, this season’s Kennedy Award winner for citizenship, was suspended for nailing Mavericks guard J.J. Barea with a swinging forearm. At the time, there were 24 seconds left in the game, the Mavericks up 12.

Artest, this season’s NBA’s Kennedy Award winner for citizenship, earlier in that game had been hit with a technical for dirty play.

Artest is such an outstanding citizen that Phil Jackson, knowing such, should have had him on the bench in the final seconds, before he could demonstrate his outstanding citizenship in garbage time.

* Ron Darling has the relaxed, fun thing down. During SNY’s Giants-Mets, Wednesday, he busted Keith Hernandez’s chops for pressing Darling’s mute button, instead of his own, before coughing.

* ESPN 1050 Radio no longer has weekday room for Brandon Tierney and Jody McDonald, two who, at the very least, tried hard to show up knowing the subject matter. But it always has room for self-smitten, bad guess-artist Stephen A. Smith.

* The California Interscholastic Federation last week approved a high school football playoff program that would have teams, should they reach the final, play as many as 16 games in one season. High school!

* Tiki Barber kinda tipped his hand, years ago. FOX allowed him to get his TV career started by hiring him when he still played for the Giants. After he retired, he showed his gratitude by signing with NBC.

* I suppose we shouldn’t be surprised, but camp site reservations at Yosemite National are now being scalped, $100-150 per night for $20 per tickets

‘New league’ is no excuse for laggards

What’s the difference between a pitch in the American League and a pitch in the National League? Especially these days, when the same umps work both?

Is an AL fastball faster? Higher? Lower? Is a NL breaking pitch different from an AL breaking pitch?

Two weeks ago, Suzyn Waldman stated that the White Sox’s Adam Dunn is in a big slump because, having arrived from the NL, he’s unfamiliar with AL pitching. “There’s a big difference,” she asserted.

Nonsense. Not only had he faced a bunch of pitchers he had faced in the NL, or in spring training, or in interleague games, or because of the game’s modern tilt toward player transience, too many batters who switch leagues find instant success for such a “fact” to be factual.

Jeff Francoeur, for example. Late last season he left the NL for Texas. He’s now with the Royals where, as of Friday, he was hitting .305 with 24 RBIs.

Gary Cohen, on SNY, Wednesday, reasoned that Francoeur’s early success with KC can be explained by “the lack of familiarity among the pitchers facing him.”

Like who? Arthur Rhodes, Carl Pavano, Dan Haren, Darren Oliver, Gavin Floyd, all former NL pitchers? AL teams don’t know how to pitch to Francoeur but NL teams did?

Is it not possible that Francouer is off to a good start because he’s off to a good start? Might Dunn be off to a bad start because, as he did in the NL, he tries to hit only home runs, thus strikes out a lot? Even at $12 million per year, he’s a career .249 hitter. Slumps are nothing new to him.

Other than the DH, the distinctions between the two leagues have been removed.

Beyond that, Miguel Cabrera is a good hitter for the Tigers as he was a good hitter for the Marlins because he’s a good hitter. Alex Cora, who has played for three AL teams and three NL teams, is a lifetime .244 hitter because, regardless of the league, he’s a .244 hitter.